by Kim Sharpe

Created on: August 06, 2008

Trust isn't something you actually build with good deeds or through actions. Its something that comes over time. Only time can form trust. This is true of both a friendship or a relationship. They both build with time and time only.

If something is done to damage the fragile trust that is built then its virutally impossable to gain it all back ever again. The wounds will be too deep and the human nature to distrust takes over inevitably.

I think that when we are young we trust more easily then when we are older. We are innocent then. Blind to the true nature of most people. We think that the world is filled with goodness and honesty. Then we age and we become more and more cynical. Or, perhaps, we just become wiser. Its wise not to give trust freely. Its wise for you to make someone earn your trust over time. If you give it away then you will inevitably get hurt. Only a few people in life deserve full trust. Some of us will be lucky enough to meet those lucky few and call them friend or spouse. But a vast majority of people will go through life without coming into contact with anyone that deserves our full trust.

A good friend is a treasured thing. Few will ever have a good friend. Its been my experience that friends come and go with the passing of years. Some people are will be kindred spirits. People that we truly click with and who we can wholeheartedly trust. Normally you will get a feeling about those people. You will know from the first moment that they are someone who you can somehow feel close too and trust. But even those select friends will only receive true trust as the years pass and its built, block by block. You must have a sturdy foundation to have a real friendship and give the trust away bit by bit over time.

So there is no key to building trust. No magic thing that any of us can do. It just evolves with each passing month and year. One day you will come to the realization that you truly do trust the person before you but only after a long road together. And, as I said, very few people deserve our full trust. You must always be cautious. Always be cynical. Then and only then will you insure that you don't get hurt and disappointed in the end. As I mentioned before, when we are young and innocent we freely trust. But sooner or later life will teach us to not be so free with our emotions. Then and only then will you be able to build a true friendship with an individual worthy of your trust. And the same holds true for a relatonship.

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