by MJ Beatty

Created on: August 05, 2008   Last Updated: August 14, 2008

Unless we are 14 and you are our 14-year-old boyfriend asking us to the school dance for our one-month anniversary, never-EVER-give us any variation on the "stuffed bear holding a box of candy" as an anniversary present. We are not your daughter, our bedroom is not decorated with purple unicorns, and we are not amused by animals wearing tuxedos. We will probably give the candy away, give the stuffie to our dog as a chew toy, and give you a lecture on our personhood and your patronizing ways. That said, I promise we're not trying to turn gift-giving into a trick question. So, to make it easy for you, here are a few tips on buying the woman in your life an anniversary present she'll love:

1) Keep a running list. Pay attention to accidental hints she might drop in conversation throughout the year and write them down. For example, she might talk about how she once had all six seasons of Sex and The City on DVD, but somehow they ended up with her former roommate and she misses watching them. Or she might talk about how cute Ugg boots are and how she loves how her feet feel in them, but she wouldn't spend that kind of money on what basically amounts to a pair of slippers. When it comes time to shop, you'll already have a shopping list.

2) Know her favorites. Know her bands, her sports teams, particular plays or operas she loves, or anything she has nostalgia for. Look online a few months before your anniversary to see if there is an event shortly after the date. Buy the tickets and wrap them up in a box with a bow to give to her at dinner on the special night.

3) Ask the girls. Go behind her back and ask her sister or her best friend if there's anything that she has mentioned wishing a man (you) would do or get for her. Chances are there is. And unless they're the jealous, surprise-spoiling sort of person (Don't ask them if they are!), they won't rat you out. They'll just think how sweet and thoughtful you are for wanting to make their girl happy.

4) Remember what you are celebrating. This isn't her birthday or Christmas, it's your anniversary together. Choose something that fosters the two of you having fun and remembering all the reasons that you're together. You could take her back to the bed and breakfast you stayed in on your first weekend away together. Or you could arrange to do something you two have been talking about but haven't got around to yet, like snorkeling or wine tasting or learning to cook Indian food. Just make sure it's something you are certain she would be into. Don't sign up for sky diving lessons only to find out that she's terrified!

Along with the gift, make sure the two of you are going to spend some quality time together on your anniversary. Make her dinner or take her out somewhere nice. Tell her you love her and why you're glad she is your partner. Happy anniversary and happy shopping!

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