by Peggy Nuckles

Created on: August 03, 2008

I admit it. I ride on the sidewalk although it is illegal. But I'm from a small American midwestern town. The code here is "don't get out of your car for no reason." The streets here are full while the sidewalks are empty.

I ride a heavy, old-fashioned step-through bicycle with handle bars designed to let me sit upright and steer. Let's face it, someone who creaks along at a stunning three miles per hour doesn't need to lean forward to lessen wind drag.

People in this town are polite to me and, although it is against my basic nature, I'm polite right back. When I reach a corner, I stop. Motorists will usually forego their turns to wave me through. When I meet a rare pedestrian, I step off my bike and walk until we pass each other. They usually apologize for being out of their cars and on my sidewalk. I couldn't agree more but I always smile and say something lame like, "Oh no, this is a sideWALK, not a sidebicycle, you have every right to be here."

I don't mean that though. I'm really thinking, "You're right jerk, get off my bike trail."

Speaking of bike trails, the city is going to build one next year. It's going to be about six blocks long and lead from my house to the downtown district. There are no sidewalks in that neighborhood. That is the only place where I ride in the street. That is also the only place where I feel genuine hatred from motorists as they blast by me, roaring their engines to let me know I held up their progress for fifteen seconds or so. I hope I live long enough to see that trail built.

I guess they are going to all of that expense because I am the town's equivalent of a two-headed freak. I went to the local Earth day celebration this past spring. The parking lot was jammed and cars overflowed onto the edge of the street that passed through the park. I wheeled up to the lady who was directing traffic and asked, "Where are you parking the bicycles?" I was only joking, I didn't mean to get her so confused and flustered.

I spent a pleasant few hours there reading literature about the joys of biking. After leaving I passed a young couple who lived a couple of blocks from the park. They were unloading children from their SUV onto the curbside and handing them 'save the earth' beachballs to carry into the house. As usual they smiled as I walked my bicycle by them and apologized for blocking my way. I replied, "Oh no, this is a sideWALK, not a sidebicycle." I wanted to say, "Couldn't you lazy idiots have walked your children to the park? After all, this is EARTHDAY. HELLOooo." But I didn't. After all, I'm enjoying my status as the town oddity and I don't want to get any motorists mad at me.

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