by Don Kwikshot

Created on: August 03, 2008   Last Updated: March 03, 2012

Humour: the Development of Modern Language

When I was at school several lifetimes ago, it seems correct English was the language spoken over the air by BBC announcers; it was the language to which we all aspired and which we were taught to speak and to use on a daily basis. It was known as Standard English' in those days, and was often a pleasure to hear. It was not quite the same as RADA' English with its terribly rounded vowels a la Audrey Hepburn, or English as spoken by the Royal Family who managed to make house' sound like hice', or May husband and Ay'! It was a good solid language, free of dialect and mispronunciation, and seemed to roll off the tongue with a good deal of ease.

I have lived in South Africa for many years and have, at times, cringed at the way the language can be mutilated, and also, sometimes have been forced to chuckle at the words and phrases used which are peculiar to this part of the world.

However, since 1994 and the advent of Democracy, Standard English has steadily bitten the dust as radio announcers have become monthly darker and darker skinned; it has now virtually been completely replaced by what is known as Afro-glish' and, to my absolute horror, when the language was being discussed on the radio some weeks ago, certain mispronunciations which are quite murderous have now been accepted as Standard South African English. I will give you some examples:

1) The verb: DETERMINE (de-TER-min) has now been more or less totally replaced with a new form: DE-TER-MINE (with the accent principally on the last syllable); I presume that this new word is intended to convey a process by which termites are removed from mines, and therefore has little or nothing to do with the original word!
2) Two nights ago I actually heard on one of our many many talk programmes the word CAPPABLE. This, of course, was intended to be CAPABLE, but once again, appears to mean something which is able to be capped, or a person who could wear a cap, given the chance!
3) CIRCUMSTANCE (surcumSTANCE) has long been a problem over the airwaves and has been almost totally replaced by cirCUMstance'. It don't think a suitable translation of this would be accepted by your editors!
4) AGREEMENT, as in an agreement between the parties was reached' has long been pronounced as AGriment' and I can only conclude that this new word refers to a kind of mint which can be cultivated for re-sale.
5) A simple word like PEOPLE (peepul) has been replaced almost totally by PIPPUL, meaning

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