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Poetry: Being invisible

Ghosting around myself, my shadow weeps and shivers.
...

When my shadow sleeps,
i wake up in a daze at work
Looking at other people's lives in heaps

and I'm supposed to fix them, but
i cannot wade through them all
i cannot fix their wounds
And do not want to try.

Sometimes my shadow peeks at me
Hanging in a corner like a black silk shirt
And i watch it watching
And wonder if it dreams
And wonder if it screams
When it sees me sobbing...

still no word in the mail for me
...i don't have the keys...anyway...
and the weather is cold and achy
so i stand out in the wind
and let it scrape me raw and toss me aside
i am its careless lover,
It is my angry love.

my shadow condemns me so
i keep its chain close since
it is MY tormentor too
we cannot let each other go
we do not trust the world alone.

Midnight at last...
i am the wraith in the wind
moaning and keening as the storm rolls in
i am my shadow standing
watching me silently, as i
shrink into my shell
under the onslaught of remembering
only what was
and not having the courage to just
be.

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