by Olivier Thomas

Created on: July 31, 2008   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

I remember the time when I came out and believe me, it was not a long time ago. As I am writing this article in July 2008, I can tell you that I came out some months ago. Anyway, I first decided to come out because I felt I was ready for this. It is true that I am 35 years old, but I think that I was not ready before. Moreover, many questions had crossed my mind. However, I felt that the time would come soon to tell the truth to my family and my friends.

I wrote down a text and saved it on my computer. It was to be sent to my friends first. I really wanted to reveal who I was but not to my parents, though I would have to tell them. I knew it was not the time yet to tell them but I could tell my friends. Actually, I thought it would be worth trying with them. They would be receptive and respectful to my letter. I waited a long time, some months before sending it. I reviewed it repeatedly, changed words in order to be as accurate as I wanted to. I did not want to lie. I just wanted to tell the truth, to reveal a secret that had been a burden for a very long time. Time had come to reveal it, as I was not able to bear it any more. It was hard to hide and to lie every time someone asked some questions about my personal life (Still single? Any girl friends?). That was not easy for me to live that way.
Finally, I decided to send my letter to my three friends. That would be a test for our friendship but I had quite no doubts about it. However, I dreaded their reaction to my letter. Nevertheless, I definitely had to do it. I would know what to think about it.
Let me tell you that it was not something easy to do. When I decided to send it, my heart was beating strongly.
I received reactions from them. I have to say I was relieved to read their answers. They all told me how they had appreciated my letter. They had read it carefully. They told me how they were impressed of my courage for having kept this secret so long. They respect my sexual orientation and this will never change nor alter our long lasting relationship for more than 15 years.
Now, I just have to tell my family. I am now ready to tell them the truth about their son. I hope they are ready because it is about me, about my life. I have waited so long that it is now time to reveal the truth.
Things are now going on with my friends. We have not talked about it yet but they are available as I am, should one of us wish to talk. It is true that it took time for me to accept my sexual orientation and to be ready to reveal it. Actually, it was not and it is not possible do keep it deep inside myself. Hopefully, I met people who had been of great help in my personal development.

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