by Julia Fregoso

Created on: July 29, 2008   Last Updated: August 01, 2008

When I was a teenager I struggled with an eating disorder. I had a poor self image of myself and thought that by choosing not to eat I had some control over my life and that would give me peace and happiness. I was wrong. I ended up hurting myself and my family around me. Rather than gaining control my eating disorder controlled my every thought and action. I dwelled on food and my self image all day long. I planned my day on how I was going to avoid eating, and looked forward to those moment where I could binge and purge. Yet afterwards I was driven to guilt. During this time I noticed that my fears were not only on food, but on other things as well, such as spiders (which I was never afraid of before). I got to the point where I was feeling sick and tired all day long because I was literally starving myself to death.

My family was scared for me and did everything they could to help me with my struggle. My closest friend in high school was struggling with an eating disorder as well. We tried to help each other through it, but being friends just made the struggle with the eating disorder harder to overcome. I went to see a councilor and nutritionist, yet still I was struggling and deeply hurting. Finally, I made a conscious decision to take steps to healing, but it wasn't until I surrendered my eating disorder to God that I noticed a change. I first took slow steps of obedience to eating right, but although I was eating better I was still struggling in every area of my life and was tempted to starve myself again. During that time I lost my virginity and as a consequence of giving up something so precious I found myself broken hearted by those relationships. My high school friend decided that she didn't want anything to do with me anymore, and I felt completely lost and alone. So, I turned even more towards God for and made a commitment towards him allowing God to heal me in all areas of my life.

It took years, but finally I found myself completely healed from these situations. I not only found myself eating right again, but I also found that my entire self was healed. I was no longer tempted into that life style. I had forgiven myself and other who had hurt me. I gained peace and joy as well. I ended up marrying my high school sweetheart, the one who broke me heart, and now we have two beautiful boys and we love each other dearly.

So, after my experiences I not only want my family to be healthy physically but I want my family to have health is all areas of their

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