by Kim T

Created on: July 28, 2008   Last Updated: November 25, 2008

Am I Living With Autism? You Be The Judge!

That is a question i have been asking myself for a few months now, whilst patiently waiting for a Paediatrics doctors appointment. I have read so many articles on the subject and am somewhat confused. Hinting this to my mother, she told me that our son is just going through the 'Terrible Two's' but i am not convinced of that. My heart strings are pulling for some reason and i think they are trying to tell me something. Am i living with Autism?

Each day is a mental drain, the tantrums, the screaming for no reason and the list goes on. My husband and i do not go out much, we don't take the kids out because of it. The simple things in life are no longer simple and i just prefer to stay at home where his screaming is somewhat hidden to the outside world. I do admit that i enjoy grocery shopping very much as it is one thing i get to do by myself. My husband drops me there and comes back to get me when i am done. On the odd occasion that the whole family does go out i feel that everybody is judging us. I can see the looks on their faces, they think that he is just a naughty little boy who's parents cannot control him, is he or Am i living with Autism?

Our son has never awoken from a sleep without immediately screaming when he wakes up. He repeats everything he says over and over and over. He loves to go to my kitchen cupboards and pull out all of my Tupperware and line them up all over the floor in neat straight lines. And when throwing a tantrum it will go on for up to 2 hours at a time,sometimes throwing himself up against the wall. Is he trying to tell me something? Have we not disciplined him properly or Am i living with Autism?

I have read that a child with Autism may walk on his/her toes and our Son also does that, he is hypo, very independent and does have strange behaviours towards certain things. The most current obsessions is that we can not turn the Television on. In the mornings my daughter likes to watch cartoons before she goes to school and it starts from there. He will go insane just over that and it makes those simple things in life so hard to deal with. Another cause of his tantrums at the moments is if we open the front door to the house, so lets just say that it does not happen very often. Am i paranoid or am i living with Autism?

On the other hand his speech is very good, he can talk in sentences, count to ten, tell me just about anything that i ask him. He knows what hot and cold is, what different colours are and so on. I have to wait until October to see the Doctor and am so scared of what we will find out. Am i living with Autism?

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