by Tracy Rollins

Created on: July 28, 2008   Last Updated: July 31, 2008

It was an ordinary day when the doctor came in for my routine check-up. I had no complications thus far. The doctor checked me, and said we must get you to the hospital. Suddenly, it was NO ORDINARY DAY. He said we might lose the baby. I was all alone at this visit, and felt fear grip me to the bone. How could this be happening, when things had been great? Tears began to stream down my face, as I prepared myself to call my husband. My stress level went from zero to this in only minutes. My husband said calm down, and said he would meet me at the hospital.

I was only 19 weeks. I could not lose this baby. This was my gift. I screamed out WHY? In the midst of my pain, I could not feel any hope. I couldn't pray at that moment. I was only fueled with questions. As I arrived at the hospital, I was taken to labor and delivery. After many test, I was told I must stay in the hospital. Bed rest was an understatement. They meant you are going to stay in bed and not get up at all. I was not even allowed to go to the bathroom or bathe. I felt like stress would overtake me. The doctor then advised me I would need to stay there until I was 23 weeks (if I could make it hat long). Then, I would be transported to a bigger facility that was better educated in premature labor and such. Oh great four weeks, only to go to another hospital. I felt like the stress would overtake me. I tried to remain calm for the baby's sake. How do you deal with such a horrifying event? I searched for this answer for many days and nights. After all, I had another child, who was now practically living with her grandmother. Then, I realized I would fight or give up. I chose to fight for my baby. I didn't want to stay in the bed, but I had no choice. I then felt a fight coming from deep within my soul. Why had I not thought to take this to the Lord in prayer? Confused and dazed I began to cry out to God. I felt he was so far away. I had done many things that were not pleasing to God or me. Would he still care? I decided to give God a try. The doctors, nurses, and no amount of comfort food seem to help me. SO, I kept praying and studying the word. I began to speak that my child would LIVE and NOT DIE. The devil thought he had pressed me as low as possible; I was struck down, but not destroyed.
I transferred to the second hospital, and things were looking hopeful. Many would say the baby will never make it, and if it does it will have so many problems. I said Lord I receive your report, not the report of man. My faith was going to new levels. I began to encourage others who entered the hospital room. Then at 30 weeks my baby girl was born weighing only 2 lbs 14 ounces. She had to stay in NICU for some time. I continued to pray and war for her. She began to improve day by day. I spoke only LIFE, never death. I refused to see any negative in her body. I prayed over her. She was born in November, and didn't come home until February. She had oxygen and monitors when she came home. I continue to pray, quote the word of God. By the time she was one year old, she was released from every specialist she was seeing. She is now four years old. She is completely healthy and smart. She has no mental or physical problems. So, how do you cope with this kind of stress? ONLY GOD!

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