8 of 8

Write now Article Tools

Page 4 of 4

some way. I rang my little sister and told her I needed to talk to her. Half an hour later I was in her house.

"Pyx I think I need help, I'm transexual and I don't know what to do. Please help me?"

She hugged me, told me she loved me and proceeded to help me. In the following weeks I wrote a short autobiography and gave it to the people who mattered to read so they would understand that I wasn't jumping into anything but that I was taking the next step in what had already been a very long road.

That road has ended with me finally being me. A tall gothy, punkish, geeky woman who wears whatever she damn well likes and does whatever she damn well wants too. I've gained so much but I lost things too.

I gained a body I love but I lost so many people I called friends.

I gained a new way of living but lost the ability to ever have children.

But I also gained an understanding that I think sometimes is missed by LGBT folk. There is for most of us a moment that we each point to as the moment we came out of the closet and danced into the light. That moment in many ways helps us to find our way to who we should have always proudly been. But in truth there is no real singular moment of coming out. It's a process like so much in life which is on going.

In the beginning there are the little signs that lead people to that clichd phrase "I kind of always knew". Then there are those faltering steps as we grow when we try to tell people what we feel often with semi-disastrous results. Eventually there comes that moment which we all point to as "The Moment" when we took our lives in our own hands and chose to stop being ashamed.

But there will always be people who we have to choose how much to tell them. There will always be that one situation, that one location, that one person who we can't be out with for what ever reason. Or those people who can know a little of the truth but not the whole truth. I think that someday we all hope deep down that we will never again have to hide anything about ourselves again, that we can be truly 100% out and proud.

It may never be achieved but I sometimes think perhaps the pride we find in our own personal courage as we reveal our true selves to each new worthy person is ample reward from a universe that often seems to care so little for our particular part of the human family.

Learn more about this author, Harper Gallagher.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

• << previous page
• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4

Add your voice

Know something about Different ways people come out of the closet?
We want to hear your view. Write now!