by Jason Vincent

Created on: July 20, 2008

It's too bad we use the word "tolerate" to describe our attitude towards a way of life different from our own. Tolerate seems like such a superior word. Like our way of life is the only way, and all others are simply aberrant functionaries of it. I love diversity. Otherwise, life, as well as people, would be very bloody boring.

The word "tolerate" also reeks of being judgmental. It's so sad when people form and express openly their own judgments about another's choice of how to live. I am guilty of doing it all the time, merely in jest, yet it is still fundamentally unacceptable in my own mind, and taken to task I will always withdraw the statement. Would you tolerate me for doing so? In other words, although a jester, would you consider my core to be intolerant? Some would, and that would be to wrongly judge, as you do not know me implicitly. Just as most do not take the time to fully understand a way of life different from their own. For example, I know absolutely nothing about Hindus. What right would I have to merely "tolerate" them? To learn everything I can about them, and "accept" their rights and abilities to live the way they choose, would be a better descriptor.

In fact, "accepting" is a much better word than "tolerating", I think, as I am writing this. To accept is divine. Even if we see someone's belief system as different, or violent, or barbaric, we would still "accept" them as humans and also realize we probably don't know what it is that truly motivates their lifestyle.

I recently moved to San Diego from Connecticut and have found people accept diversity a hell of a lot better than back home. This is truly comforting to me as it is a much easier way to live and much more happy. I feel people here "accept", more than "tolerate", where in New England I feel it is the complete opposite.

Next time someone asks you if you can tolerate a gay person, or black or white person, or Islamic, or New Englander, stop and think, is "tolerate" the right word? And, do feel right using it? Does it feel just, or appropriate? Think hard about how you feel about a certain group. Are you superior enough to merely "tolerate". How would you want someone to categorize you. Would you rather they tolerate, or accept? It's an interesting question.

A lot of the world's problems would disappear if we as the human race would learn to understand, and then accept diversity and figure out how to harness the energy behind all ways of life and use it to better the lifestyles of all regardless of belief systems and ideals.

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