by Gary Maclean

Created on: July 20, 2008   Last Updated: February 08, 2012

What a sad and scary word, divorce. Nobody likes to say it and certainly no one wants to hear it. Little can be said about divorce that will make it a positive word, experience or event. The action may be necessary and the result may be positive, but the sheer thought of a divorce sends chills up most kid's spines. Still, we will get divorced, as a collective society, we will get divorced.

The most recent statistics reveal that, of first marriages; from 41% to 50% of them will go through divorce. Of second marriages, from 60% to 67% will end in divorce. Worse yet is the record for third marriages. You would think we would have it right by then, but still, from 73% to 74% of all third marriages will end up in divorce court.

Somewhere along the line, about half of all children in the USA will be faced with their parents getting a divorce. I can remember as a kid how threatening the sound of that word was. It could make me sick to my stomach just to hear it; and I was already experiencing a hideous childhood. Yet, the thought of and the reputation of "Divorce" was so threatening that I did not want my white Mom to divorce the black man she had so hastily married. I was more willing to put up with the horror of the childhood I was experiencing than I was to go through the unknown horror of a divorce; it was that ominous of a thought.

My Mom had divorced my real Dad when I was only four years old. I was so young that I can barely recollect a few scenes of the misery that followed. By the time she had married the black imposter we spent the next eight to nine years with, I was of an age that I could understand what was going on; I could comprehend her actions. The simple sound of that one little word, divorce, would shock me and it kept me content to endure the grisly childhood I had been gifted with, rather than experience a divorce.

Many of us, I say "us" since I have been divorced, twice, and am a self-proclaimed member of the club, like to say, "put the children first." First of all let me tell you something. This is coming from a kid who is the product of a broken home. All you need do is to think of a divorce, or simply mention the word, or ask your kid what they would think about moving away, and you have suddenly put the children "LAST!" There is no "put the children first" when it comes to divorce. The only way you can put them first is to not even entertain the thought of divorce. Sorry, that is a cold, hard fact.

Mom may be a harlot or Dad may be a womanizer,

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