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which received the Nobel Prize for proving that black was actually white, and that the converse was true also! This opened the way for vast, unheard of changes in science and society in general. Another triumph of the Institute of Linguistics was with the word "marriage" for now we can have two men, or two women getting married! But I digress.

It was within the realm of dialectical materialism that real progress was made by the Institute of Linguistics. In Nature everything is a harmonious unity of opposites. If black can be white, it follows logically, that high can be low, and vice versa, and by differentiating we see that cooling can mean warming, and if need be, vice versa.

Furthermore, if black can be white then it is obvious that red can be green! Garnets are red, but some are green! All former "red herrings" are now acceptable "green herrings". The mind boggles at the practical applications that lie ahead for mankind. For starters, 2 April 2007 the US Supreme Court ruled that the vital atmospheric gas CO2 is a pollutant under the Clean Air Act.... they forgot to ask the plants about that one!

These theoretical discoveries of the Institute of Linguistics are fed into the Institute of Mystification and Development for formulation of practical applications and Government Policy for the benefit of supporters of the world's only political party, the Green Democratic Union (GDU), which has headquarters somewhere in Europe. From here the information is given the final polish at the World College of Dissemblers, from which all politicians are required to graduate and do yearly refresher courses.

Politicians have now been given a whole new armory to explain their policies. They are always right no matter what happens! How fortunate we are to have such geniuses at the helm.

The World College of Dissemblers was founded in 2008 by Sir Professor Dr Leggless Garnet who is now Vice Chancellor. It was his classic diabolical schemes to reduce green house gas emissions that saved the world from imminent destruction, just moments before the tipping point was reached! He is revered for his brilliant application of Poirotian logic. His motto: "I must be right, because I am never wrong!"

There followed the inspired Inca and Aztec Solutions and the invention of the Green Cracker and founding of the Great Green Cracker Company and also the Great Green Gas Mask Company which in aggregate saved the world from being engulfed in appalling green house gas emissions.

And now, year 2020,

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