by Valtie

Created on: July 18, 2008   Last Updated: September 09, 2008

Try to Keep Breathing

She lead me form her front door,

Like on an ordinary day,

She threw her purse on the couch he was always on,

Went to the kitchen where she called to him,

"Honey, I'm home!"

Then we journeyed down the hallway to the bathroom

Because he never replied...

She said to herself,

"He must be grumpy again."

(Sick people usually are)...

"But I still love 'em anyway!"

With each following knock on the door she called

"Hope"

"You're"

"Not"

"Dead"

"In "

there!"

We opened the door,

Like in a low-budgety horror movie,

Slowly...

Teeth clenched shut.

I wonder how many times she's retraced these steps?

(They are already so worn!)

The door opened just to find him leaning over to one side!

She said frantically,

"You've got to try to keep breathing!"

He faintly agreed "...yeah....!"

I felt a knot in the pit of my stomach as we trailed the abulance to the ER.

It was familiar the way that none of us were breathing quite right.

Our chests were weighted with anticipation

As they wheeled him into CCU.

All we could do was concentrate on the uncompromising numbers

Of his vital signs hanging above his bed...

(It was almost as if we were trying to memorize them for a test,

Or perhaps "will" them into changing).

For a few more especially uncomfortable moments

We had to leave that room.

We wound up getting lost together,

Holding hands in a fog of possibilities.

We'd mentally searched for every "what if"

That sat back home on her book shelves.

But found there weren't any words in them to help!

There was nothing any of us could do or say...

Uninvited...REALITY made its way into the room

We'd barricaded with denial.

It shamelessy put our hopes to rest!

It forced her sign her name

On the bottom line

-.

She wrestled with whom to blame,

Life or death?

She barely had the strength to see beyond her tears

As they compassionately,

Took him off of the life support...

One plug at a time.

We could do nothing...

But hug and cry...

And...

Try to keep breathing!

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