by Dorothy Marie Kucera

Created on: July 17, 2008   Last Updated: July 18, 2008

Yes, I think all contact should be cut off with people who consistently show you disrespect, no matter what form it takes. Whether they keep trying to force you into saying or doing something that you have repeatedly explained makes you uncomfortable or whether they are mocking, belittling, slandering or assaulting you verbally or physically in other ways, it is clear that they do not respect you, are out of control, have no intention of honoring your request and simply put, they are not your friends. You are under no obligation to put up with this year after year, going through a cycle of forgive, forget, be abused and be disappointed yet another time. God is on your side. In the Bible, the Book of Proverbs repeatedly talks about separating yourself from bad company and teaches you how to find good friends. You can tell the difference by considering Proverbs 17: 10 in the King James Version: "A reproof entereth more into a wise man than an hundred stripes into a fool." You are known by the friends you keep. Do you want to be known as a wise person or as a fool?

Whatever their reason for persisting in such tormenting behavior, be it a power struggle for control, a game to push your "hot buttons" just to get a negative response out of you because they are bored and looking for entertainment, a matter of ignorance and lack of etiquette, a denial of the validity of your request, a physiological brain reaction from a high thyroid level or high sugar intake or drugs or even if it is caused by mental illness or dementia, you do not have to let them jerk you up and down like a yo-yo toy. You need to get control of the situation for your own peace of mind and health of your body. Stress causes disease. Since they have proven that they cannot control their treatment of you, then you are the one who needs to put distance between you and them.

In the case of caregivers who live 24/7 with such patients who have physical or mental ailments driving such behavior, you need to get a support system into your home to give you mini-breaks as well as professional advice about the causes and various common-sense and natural solutions that will calm your patients down without drugs. There are natural relaxants you can both take to keep blood pressure down so the exchange of words do not get either of you so upset that a stroke is precipitated. Those remedies enable you to stand there during the barrage of words, quietly assessing the medical or psychological reason for upset that

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