Deja vu is defined as a feeling of having already experienced the present situation. It's a French phrase that means, 'already seen,' but the best way for me to explain deja vu is to share my story with you.
A MEMORY OF SOMETHING ALREADY SEEN:
One day, in a place that seems far away today, I was driving down a lonely old road, when I came across a lonely, old home, and somewhere deep within my soul I knew and believed that a lonely, old soul lived in that home. It was an amazing sight to see for me, and what an amazing feeling to be looking at a sight I'd never seen in my life, but to know and believe that I'd already seen this home, and it almost felt like a home I owned.
I tried to drive by, but something inside just stopped me. I was mesmerized. That's what deja vu does to you. It's a spiritual feeling, as if a heaven sent angel arrives to remind you of something you thought you forgot, but need to remember again. I wracked my brain for a time frame that might have slipped my mind, but the truth is and was the fact that I'd never been down that road, at least, not until then. The house was unique, and although it was kept neat, I just knew the front porch had a squeak on step number three.
It seemed to me that no one was home, so I drove up the drive to see with my own eyes if the deck had a squeaky step. I made up my mind that if someone came outside, I'd pretend to be lost and ask to use the phone. That is, if they had one. The house had seen better days.
You see, I was only seventeen when I arrived where deja vu led me to. It was my first experience with the mystery, so I had no clue what to do or what it meant to see something new, but so old and familiar too. Slowly, I moved toward the house and when I got to the steps, I held my breath. I took step one and paused there to listen and look before I took step two. Step three seemed so distant to me, so I lifted my foot high, and then I heard it. . .errreeeek. My, was I surprised. Still, before I could even think to squeal with delight, a lady came outside.
"Hello, who's there," she asked? The sun was in my eyes, so it took a moment to realize the lady was blind. "Forgive me," I pled. "I thought I was lost, but now I think I know where I am." I explained to the elderly lady that her home seemed familiar to me, so I stopped to drop by and ask if I looked familiar to her too, but the moment I asked her that, my face turned to a crimson red. I was mortified when I realized she was blind, but she said, "Won't you please come inside for a while to sit and rest?" I complied, but if my mom had known this, she'd have wrung my neck and said, "Who cares about a squeaky, old deck?" Still, when deja vu comes to you, there's nothing you can do but to go with the moment to feel the mystery and the need to solve it.
I went inside, and to my surprise, even her things seemed alarmingly familiar. Granted, she had some things that reminded me of my great grandmother's home. It was cozy and warm, so by the time I sat on her sofa, she had already asked me if I'd like something to drink. "I've just made some hot tea." She smiled at me so sweetly that it felt as if she knew me, but then again, she seemed to be something between a friend and a parent. I don't know why, but she actually began to call me by a name that wasn't the same as mine. For reasons that seem strange, I didn't mind. Old people get names rearranged all the time.
Together, we sipped our tea and chatted about nothing in particular. We might have discussed the weather, for all I can remember, but I do recall that she told me she'd been blind for a very long time. She seemed lonely and I wondered if her home felt as if it was a prison. Still, she seemed happy and pleased, "to see me," ironically, and before I left I felt as if I'd found a treasure. The funny thing is that she said the same thing when she gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. That's when I knew that deja vu is a sign of truth and leads to treasures beyond measure. I thought I saw a tear in her eye when she waved good bye. Still, I drove back home and never saw her or her home again. Or, did I?
WHAT DEJA VU MEANS: THE VISION OF TRUTH
I can't say that I ever thought of that lady again, until recently, that is. It was as if deja vu came back to me, but it took me some time to remember why. Then, when I remembered what I thought I forgot, I almost cried as I hoped and prayed that old, blind lady was reminded of me too. She, alone in her home, arrived in my life for a moment in time and helped me to see through wiser eyes than mine could have been as a teen, with only the feeling of deja vu to lead me to the truth.
You see, I too became a blind, old lady, but then again, I'm fifty-two, which is probably the same age that lady was when I found her as a teen. Since then, I now see that teens don't have a clue what, "old," means, I can still see some things, and I'm only blind legally, which means my home sometimes feels like a prison for me. It's lonely to be legally blind and I feel invisible sometimes, so on one of those invisible days a knock at my door made me feel not so lonely anymore.
A young lady stood on my doorstep and said, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I had a flat and I don't know how to fix it." Asking her to come inside, I summoned my husband to fix the flat tire. He didn't mind, but when I asked the girl to sit for a while and rest, my husband looked at me as if I'd gone insane. He didn't say a thing, but I could read his mind. I knew he was thinking, "Why does she feel the need to sit and visit with a total stranger?" I'd have answered him if he'd have waited for me to reply to reading his mind, but he didn't. Instead, he closed the door and left us to chat about nothing in particular. I'm sure the young lady and I discussed the weather, as far as I can remember, but I do recall that I told her how nice it was to see and be visiting with a visitor. She smiled and said, "You look so familiar."
That's when I knew it was true. Deja vu is a sign of truth. It's a thought we thought we forgot, but when God sends the angel to remind us, we see through a vision of deja vu what wisdom is and will always be. That's why deja vu is something we've already seen. For two teens and two old ladies, wisdom means that we can see through God's vision, and even legally blind, we can see the light. We don't have to feel invisible or in a prison, lost and alone in our own home. So, today I say, "If it squeaks, it's probably just deja vu," but the only thing I know is true, is the fact that the road that leads to deja vu always begins and ends with compassion.
To Conclude:
Don't dismiss deja vu when it happens to you. It comes in a moment and then it fades away. So, the next time this mystery comes your way, pay attention to the clue the angel of deja vu gives to you. It just might be a defining moment in your life, or the gift of insight. Please remember me when deja vu comes to you, and it might lead you back to me or me to you, some day soon. After all, it could be true that deja vu is why they say, "God works in mysterious ways."