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I've witnessed true unmitigated fear in a child's eyes and watched her overcome it by just taking one step forward, literally.
I help at a camp for at-risk children. These kids have virtually no family support at home, being degraded to the point of sapping any remaining self esteem they might possess. We invite them to this camp to build them up, to make them feel like the champions they deserve to be.
Several events occur in the three days they are there, but the highlight of the week is being able to traverse the tenuous rope course, the largest such course in the Midwest. Constructed with 27 different elements for campers to test their will and courage, I've seen the bravest child cower in fear because when you're 40 feet in the air with only a harness and a rope attached to you and a foreboding view of green grass so far below, it's enough to take anyone's breath away.
The girl in question who inspired me the most faced such a fear. Perched on the top platform, I watched as this 12-year-old girl hug a pole with all her might because she was so frightened of walking across a moving log.
"I love this pole," she laughed, nervously. Soon her laughter turned to tears as we coached her to take that first step on the log. "I want to go home," she cried. "I want my mommy." Part of me wanted to go over to her, pick her up and give her that first nudge, but the bigger part of me stood my ground and encouraged her to take that first step. She had to experience the fortitude it required to master that element.
Most of the time, we're able to get the kids to move, but she was so petrified, her fear paralyzed her. In those particular cases, we have a facilitator "rescue" her. The difference is we don't let children give up on themselves, merely because if they do it there, they will do it in their lives away from camp.
The facilitator quickly negotiated his way to the log. With her crying each step she took, he grabbed one hand while she gripped the tether mightily with the other.
"I can't do it," she blubbered. "I want to get down from here."
"I'm here to tell you that you can do it," he encouraged her. "The only way you can get down from here is to come to me. Walk this log and you'll find yourself on the ground soon."
While I was watching this transpire, I was amazed at what a person's mind goes through in such a dire situation. Given the option of retreating or moving forward she stood there paralyzed. The more she thought about it, the more it became quite evident
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