by Samantha Giving

Created on: July 12, 2008   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

Friday, July 11, 2008. A date that will be forever etched in my mind; the day my life changed. Today is the day that my parents dropped in for a surprise visit; a happy thing that they hardly ever do; something that I wish they did more often. But it wasn't so happy. Today is the day that I found out that my Mom has breast cancer.

So far for bad news, the news is good. It is a small, 1 " mass that is isolated in her right breast. There is suspicion that there is a similar mass in her left breast; yet to be officially diagnosed, but it's there on the MRI film looking extremely similar to the mass in her right breast. The doctor said, "it's horrible news, but it's surrounded by good news".

She meets with the surgeon on Tuesday. We will have more answers then; or at least a list of options.

I have to tell you about my Mom. She's the best. You won't meet a more kind or giving woman. She's there at the drop of a dime if you need her for anything, day or night. My three girls, her only grandchildren, absolutely adore her. Grama is a lot of fun; she's silly, carries Rice Krispie treats in her purse and takes them for sleepovers. I do no think that there is an ounce of bad in her. She instilled in me what I believe to be the most important personal value: "Think of how your actions or words will affect others before you act or speak." I live my life by that sentence, and I believe that it helps me be a better person.

I knew this day was coming though; I just didn't know what the calendar date would be. She smoked like a chimney for years. She has cut down; I'm not sure she's quit, but she has significantly cut down, but that does not undo all the damage that she has already done. I was actually surprised to hear her say "I was so surprised to get this diagnosis as we have not had any cancer in our family." I didn't feel it was appropriate to let her know that I wasn't surprised. This is my anger talking.

But, the bad news is good. It was caught early, and my parents are ready to be extremely aggressive. My Mom is a very positive person; and I know that positive thinking can be instrumental in surviving. I know that I will do everything physically possible to help her through this; just as she would help me. She has my Dad too, and he will be by her side regardless of what happens.

Without any real information, except that it's breast cancer, they are already considering a mastectomy. I think that is the way to go too; again it's first impression and lacking in any medical information. My mom is scared of the way that she will look physically, and I know that I would be too, but as my dad put it "I'd rather that you were alive, than in a casket with breasts." But, without breasts, breast cancer can't return, can it?

And so, our battle begins. My Mom left a little over an hour ago. I miss her already. My brother doesn't know yet; he'll find out tomorrow. My husband, who is away on business, only arrives tomorrow morning; so I'm finding comfort in my writing and my red wine tonight.

I am here to help my Mom fight the battle of her life; at age 59. And, I now have a history of breast cancer, and so do my three daughters, ages 1,3 and 5. And, when I woke up this morning, I thought that today would be a good day

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