Every year in the month of December, I hear to cries of football widows everywhere asking "When will this torment end?" It saddens me really, because football is one of my great passions. When I was a little girl, the surest way for me to spend time with my father was to sit in the den with him on Sunday afternoon and watch professional football.
At first I was confused and couldn't understand much, but eventually between my father's admonishment of the offensive line, the announcers second guessing of the referees, and my own astute powers of observation, I was not only understanding the game...I was HOOKED.
Here are a few tips for those women who need to get a grip on the basics and set themselves on a path to enjoying football:
1) Pick the team with the uniform you like the best, or the cutest quarterback (Tom Brady) and keep your eyes on them.
2) The object of the game is to throw or run the football from your side of the field ( end zone) to other teams side of the field. If you throw or run the football into the other team's end zone...you score. If you can't throw or run it in, you can try to kick it in through the goal posts. The game lasts four quarters.
3) Each team has four plays (downs) on offense to move the ball ten yards. If the do, they get another set of downs. If they don't they have to give the ball back to other team. Most teams will utilize three plays and then punt the ball to the other team, giving them further to go to score.
4) A touchdown is 6 points. An extra point is 1 point and a two point conversion is two points.
4) A field goal is 3 points.
These are the basics. If you can grasp these simple rules you can at least understand what is going on. There are a lot of complicated rules which result in all kinds of penalties, but don't worry about that. Just keep your eyes on your team's uniform. When your quarterback is on the field scream " Go! Go!" When he is not on the field yell " Stop them!" It seems simple, but I guarantee you it works.
Eventually, you will pick up the subtleties and nuances of the game and you will begin to know what a "good play" and a " good call" are. Before you know it, you will know what play your team should call on 3rd down and 5, and when they get it wrong you can throw up your hands and say " Are you kidding me?" Until then enjoy the view.