by Paul Schingle

Created on: July 07, 2008

I had always said that I learned more in college outside the classroom than I ever did inside. One of the most important aspects of breaking away from mom and dad and attending school away from home is meeting new people from all walks of life. You may not use your roommate as a "guide" or parent surrogate, as some have suggested. But, having a roommate can definitely help a person free him/her self from his/her shell and learn how to socialize with all kinds of different people.

Now, I'm very far removed (28 years) from my freshman year in college. But, I remember the first year like it was yesterday. I learned a lot and, at least partially, I have roommates to thank for it. My very first roommate doesn't really count. It wasn't a good match. We had little in common. I'm not saying he was a bad guy-we just didn't click. Fortunately, at the three week mark, we were allowed to change rooms on campus and I got to, essentially, choose my roommate. From that day forward, my freshman experience improved dramatically.

Now, I was never the most-outgoing guy you'd ever want to meet. In fact, though some who know me now may argue, I was actually pretty shy. It wasn't unusual for me to tell my roommate that I was just going to stay home and do laundry on a Friday night. Fortunately for me my roommate would not accept this answer from me-especially on a Friday. And, I'm a better person for it.

One thing I want to make clear. I'm not talking about partying for the sake of partying. I did plenty of that as well. But, my roommate was the type who would tell me to wake up, come alive and go with him to some party he'd heard of in town. And, while I would have my share of beer at said soiree, the more important factor in the whole party thing was, I was meeting more and more people from all over the world-literally. I learned that I wasn't the only one who thought I was funny. I learned from other people's sense of humor, sense of place in the world, sense of belonging.

If I'd never had a roommate my first year in school, I probably would have gotten approximately the same grades in the same classes and learned the same things-in the classroom. But, thanks to a roommate who made me pull out of myself-who made me face new things-who made me not be afraid (or more accurately let me be afraid, but try new things anyway), I am a better person for it all. In the real, post-college world one must learn how to be around people one has never met in order to succeed. Having a roommate, especially in the first year, can help one learn this life's lesson.

Is it better to have a roommate during your first year in college? My own experience says that you're much better off if you do.

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