by Luis Medel

Created on: July 07, 2008

I felt it suddenly fill up this tiny cup inside me. But I guess it was quickly spilled and brushed off as nothing. Like many times before, it's just this 30 second paranoia. The kind that comes and goes and always leaves the door open. Never wipes it's feet. never washes it's hands or picks up after itself. At some point, it's welcome has long been worn out. Now it's just a matter of time before it's time to either send it packing or unroll the sleeping bag.

These heavy thoughts and feelings generally spawn from randomness and lord knows when they meet peace. In this case, it was probably an inanimate segment of an inanimate conversation. Like a virus that finally finds the victim it longs for and when it does, it makes it's presence known. It sticks out for some reason. Simple words that mean more than they say. Like an iceberg floating in the semi-frozen ocean, you see the tip, but lurks more beneath the surface. How I was able to conceive these visions of betrayal and infidelity is beyond me. Like a bullet made of words dipped in anxiety is fired out the mouth and aimed straight for my head. Like a train without brakes that goes faster and faster has only one destination. Boom. The seering kiss of pain shoots out of me like a fire hose. It's lodged deep and burns like hell. But in a quick second, it's extinguished without a mark. A parasite that lays it's eggs in it's host. It remains quiet and still. That is until it's awakened by it's catalyst. It's alarm. Another inanimate set of words. True words. Burden of proof type words. Reality check. Now these parasites that I didn't even know existed are up; fierce and hungry. Preying on any hope I had that they didn't even exist are devoured to the bone. These visions are clearer and more abundant than before. These parasites. Contractions may vary. Erratic incubation periods. No known cures to speak of.

What I don't know can't hurt me, right?

What are friend's for?

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