by Sylviane Nuccio

Created on: July 04, 2008

I often ask people: What is more important to you, perception or reality?
More often than not people will say that reality is more important to them.
My contention is that people deal more often with perception than reality.
This perception versus reality fact is affecting your business, and an understanding or this fact will help you see through the eyes of your prospects.

How many times have you seen a situation when someone didn't necessarily know that something was true, but they perceived that something to be true? They perceived it that way because that was THEIR reality. The fact is, this was just a perception.

For example you might pass by someone you know on the street and that person passes right by you without even looking at you. Your immediate thought could be that the person is upset with you for some reason and didn't even want to say hello. So, now you feel hurt and sad. As a matter of fact, maybe next time you see that person again you might even try to ignore him or her as well.

All those feelings are coming from YOUR perception of what you just saw. The reality, however is that this person just heard a very bad news about a loved one and was so deeply depressed that no matter who would passed him or her by wouldn't have been noticed what so ever, considering the circumstances.

You would have had the opportunity to comfort that person when they needed it the most, but because of your perception, you passed them by ignoring the one who you perceived was ignoring you.

Someone could be nicely dressed and groomed and yet be broke. Another person right next to him could look pretty sloppy and yet have 2 million dollars in the bank.
The list could be long.

We are led by our perceptions. We are moved and driven to think of others based on our perception.

This leads to another theory, which is, whenever someone opens their mouth to say anything to you. Whenever someone does anything to you, they are trying to influence your behavior based on their perceptions. They either try to make you happy, sad, glad, mad or any of the wide ranges of emotions.

So when you are speaking to someone, or when you are spoken to, remember, you are being influence based on someone's perception. Influence is being conducted on you right now.
So in your day to day speaking with people, realize how you are being influenced and think of the conversation that you're having. Is it based on perception or is it based on reality.

How could you use this concept to your advantage when you talk

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