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Yes

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Yes, it is. Although there are many variables to this questions. There are children who live out of state and are unable to physically be with their parents.

Other children may be physically handicapped or too ill themselves to participate in caring for their parents. Or a son or daughter may have such a large family themselves, there's no room for Mom and Dad to move in.

However, there are other alternatives.

If children are not available, they can pool their resources and hire help for parents. One way is by employing a cleaning service every two weeks to keep the house free from clutter and dirt. There are agencies that schedule volunteers who will run errands, grocery shop, drive clients to the doctor, cook and simply sit as a home companion.

It's always a good idea to inform your parents' physician and staff concerning your parent's situation. Ask for a list of medications that have been prescribed, what they are for and their side effects. Request a visit from a social worker to keep an eye on your folks.

Contact your parents' friends and pastor and ask them to check in on your Mom and Dad.
Call or write your parents often. Let them know you care even though you're not close by.

If you live near your parents you can still incorporate all the above. Trying to do it all yourself can lead to burnout.

My mother lives with my youngest brother who is single. Mom is ninety-four. When she first came to live with him she was able to drive and still play golf. But over the years her health has declined. My brother took on more and more responsibility and was showing signs of fatigue. The family advised him to contact senior citizen agencies for assistance. They were a tremendous help.

Mom now has help with bathing, a new top of the line walker, hair cuts and nail manicures, and a home companion who visits her twice a week. My brother recently learned that Mom also qualifies for a house cleaning service. This has freed him up so he is not tied to the house twenty-four hours a day. Will she have to be admitted to a nursing home some day? We don't know. Our hope for now is that Mom will enjoy as much quality of life as she can.

When you think of the years our parents cared for us and the sacrifices they made on our behalf, it's only right that they are repaid with love and good care. Remember, you are modeling to your own children the type of care you hope to receive when you become elderly.

Learn more about this author, Carol Gustke.
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