by Dan Murray

Created on: June 27, 2008

TROUBLE CARS: ROSIE

I suppose there are people who have always driven reliable cars. Somewhere. Reliable people, probably. The kind who worked 42 years for one company, always drove a U.S.-made, et al, changed the oil diligently, traded in every three years. You know them, a rare breed now to be sure.

Then there are the rest of us, and our rides. Most of us have had that unforgettable car, the one that was a necessity of the moment but a constant source of duress. The headlights fluctuated, the starter was balky, the so-then sunroof leaked, doors didn't open, you had to bang on things to get them to work cars have an arsenal of torments.

This car was your lone transportation, and without transportation you were mud. But no matter how much you cussed it, cajoled it, begged and prayed, no matter how much money you fed it, you could never be sure from one day to the next that it was going to get you where you needed to go. It would tease you, give you glimmers of hope. But it would never let you relax, and the next bad situation always waited around the next corner like a doom cloud.

Most of us had names for those cars, but I never did, though I've driven plenty of qualifiers. And been driven to my temper's limit by them. After 46 years of living with women, I've decided my cars would have been named Rosie.

I'm sure there are some saintly Rosies, but I'm also sure that most men from San Antonio south know what I'm talking about.

So while there is a library of songs about hotrods and chariots of youth, there aren't too many about the cars of the slow burn. Here's one:

ROSIE
You looked tight, felt right, Rosie
We made a pair on the town
But the day I set my mind on you
You started letting me down

I'm begging you, Rosie please
We're almost there, Rosie please
Rosie please, I'll do anything

No money I spent could appease you
Coddling was idling in vain
Maybe you'd take me home easy
Or leave me cursing in the rain

I'm begging you, Rosie please
We're almost there, Rosie please
Rosie please, I'll do anything

We parted in July in the desert
You broke down; I walked away
Singing "Don't ever ride with a Rosie
She's running the lost highway"

I'm begging you, Rosie please
We're almost there, Rosie please
Rosie please, I'll do anything

I'm begging you, Rosie please
We're almost there, Rosie please
Rosie please, I'll do anything

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