by Rex Coker

Created on: June 25, 2008   Last Updated: June 17, 2009

There are many signs that lead to a marriage ending. A list of things that can tell you your marriage is over can start with the lack of communication. A confusing time of wonderment on how things went so wrong so fast. A soul searching time and remembrance of fond memories and hellish fights. Once the acceptance of problems not resolved takes place, it is hard to stop the inevitable out come from happening.

Most marriages are given up on to easily. It is far more easier to end the relationship than to work it out. If the relationship is worth the fight maybe we should all look deep inside ourselves and talk about what needs to be done to save it. When this avenue fails and either party is not willing to communicate about it, then the marriage is well on its way to being over.

The marriage is over when you do not even attempt to try. One person on either side of the matrimonial fence can not sway a persons view, you both have to want to save your marriage. When all else fails the marriage is truly over. You will fill the void with excuses and hurtful words just to avoid fighting with your spouse. No one likes to fight and when you are deciding on things of mutual interest such as kids and money, the out come can be hazardous to a compromising civil dispute and this is a sure sign that the marriage is taking its toll towards being over.

The loss of friendship in the marriage is more important than loosing the lover. Sex clouds our emotions and closing that aspect of the relationship is the hardest. Cutting the ties that bind two people together often go through a transition during a separation of a couple. When you both find you have exhausted all avenues of reconciliation, you will find that the marriage is truly over. The serving of divorce papers to your spouse can be the final straw to ending the marriage. It is this point that both parties realize that all is lost if they do not make an attempt to reverse the action. Still the serving of divorce papers is a reality check to a couple living apart due to separation.

Growing apart over the years and finding that your mate longs for independence is a heart wrenching sign. The only option many have is to let it run the course. To realize that your spouse does not need you to survive is a hard blow to any one's moral.

The other signs fill in the later categories. The long drives or talking to friends to the wee hours of the morning only bring mistrust and doubt. If you can not trust your mate and think they are having an affair, the marriage might as well be over. When people give up on one another, the pain that comes from not willing to fight to stay together goes out the window.

If you love a person it is sometimes best just to set them free. I know this sounds crazy and so ditto, but making some one happy in a marriage can be a love smothering ordeal. It is better to end the marriage than loose the friendship. Many broken marriages find they are better friends than they were mates.

Free will has ended many marriages, because of shifting responsibilities with kids and mates over the course of years. Expectations and broken promises add up and the little things do count. We take so many things for granted and a good marriage is one of them. Couples that are ending a marriage do not dwell on the good things, they get caught up in all the things that made the marriage bad and not worth fighting for. That is when you know it is over!

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