Getting used to confronting or challenging people is not an easy task but one that can and should be learned to be done in the right way. I think that the most valuable lesson a human being can take on is learning to disarm the ego to avoid the illusory and temporary happiness that arises from immediate self-gratification, self-importance, and the love of material things. The ego will never lead you to true love or everlasting peace of mind and happiness. It is very difficult to think, speak and act from a higher level when one does not know how to control the ego. This is not to say that one is not be gratified or have material things, but that anything worth having or experiencing in life comes with a higher purpose to help the receiver achieve real dreams and desires that are true and everlasting. So, there's always work to be done. If you think you can't win a marathon without proper training, why would you think that you can have anything you want at the snap of a finger and win at life. Life is all never changing principle.
When you begin to recognize the difference between the real you and the ego, you begin to understand that the ego's primary function is survival and not to lead you to true love, peace of mind, or happiness because that is not it's function but yours. It is your responsibility to learn how to think, feel and act the right way, since you are the captain of your ship. When you give your personal power away to your emotions, other people, circumstances or conditions, you are in big trouble because you are giving power to things that have no power at all and therefore can't possibly lead you in the right direction. All your power is within you and it is very much alive and willing to help you live a great life, but you've got to recognize it and you must be willing to do what is right at all times. You can not compromise with life because you think that you will not get what you need or want. The most effective way to push all the good things out of life is to do the wrong thing. All of the good and finer things in life require dedication, discipline and persistence. When great things happen in your life, it looks like magic to others, but you know it is no magic to you because you intentionally set a goal and worked toward it in faith that you would succeed. And I am talking about things happening naturally in your life and not you scheming to exalt yourself externally while pushing your way through to make things happen as happiness derived from that kind of success is short lived and will never feel the same as the real thing.
In life the only true challenge or war that you are ever going to win is against yourself. You know you have no control over other people. In the long run, you will never win by fighting against anything or anyone but by learning to choose from within the terms of indifference or by stating your truth intelligently without hurting others or resorting to vituperation. When you realize that no one or anything has power over you unless you give it to it, you have won a battle you will never have to fight. However, until you discover that you are not your ego and that you alone are to make all decisions, the ability to confront yourself, people, and situations wisely will be a daunting task. The ego is not your consciousness, therefore it does not know right from wrong. When you allow your desires to overrule your power of choice no matter the outcome of the situation, you will suffer and those things that you so much desire will elude you because you are not operating from a position to allow the good to come into your life. And you can go ahead and acquire that thing that you want the wrong way and you will certainly have it your way, but you will suffer in ways that you know not for the simple reason that you cannot cheat life. You may think that no one is looking, but you are not realizing that perhaps things aren't going as well for you and that your health is also lacking. You are an amazing being born to live your life the right way and when you don't your body knows it and your soul knows it. You may think that this is unfair, but life does have its checks and balances to help you find your way. All you need to do is listen and pay attention.
So the point is that you are always challenging yourself to make choices, but the right choices come from a place of peace, sureness and silence. You get there when you have learned to tell difference between consciousness and ego. You have also understood that you can't give what you don't feel in your heart, so you begin to love yourself by taking you and your business seriously. You can't do what's right by anyone if you can't do what's right for yourself. Honesty and integrity begin with the self. Standing up for yourself, refusing to be a doormat, and rejecting all kinds of disrespect from people including the notion that peace must come at any price, is the only path to freedom. You can be firm and get your point across to others without insults or vituperation. This is not easy and you may loose your head along the way and say the wrong things to defend what's right, but your commitment to do what's right will help you realize new and better ways to handle all situations. You will be inspired to walk away from situations where you know the spiritual understanding is lacking, so rather than attacking people you are happy to let it go.
When it comes to doing what's right your thoughts and actions must be of an impersonal nature. Feeling guilty about telling the truth is unacceptable and will only delay your good from you. Always make sure that you are acting on behalf of the truth and not by what you heard or think may be true. Look into things and analyze them. The truth can never be hidden from those who seek it. When you believe in the power of goodness all is revealed to you step by step. I say this from personal experience. Last week I made a decision to do the right thing and confront a co-worker with my truth because I could no longer support this person's behavior. This person felt that because he was above my position, I had no say and must follow along without complaints. In my new universe that is not how life works, we are all equal no matter who the person is or what they do. All are responsible for doing what's right. At this point my tolerance level had run its course and continuing to put up with this person's ignorance of the truth of life was making me ill, so I had a choice to make. I knew that telling the truth to the people above him would mean risking being out of work and I also knew that I was not going to be supported because the people involved making decisions were more concerned about monetary rewards than doing the right thing. You see they don't believe that true success always comes from doing what's right and appropriate. In every major success story the original mission has always been a noble one to do what's right for humanity. However, once the wealth starts pouring in and ego driven individuals become involved pretending that they do care about the work when they really don't, all sorts of problems and situations begin to arise and eventually the empire collapses because the original vision has been lost.
So I did what my heart told me to do and I expressed all of my concerns about this person and to this person as well. My communication was direct and to the point, but compromising to this person's credibility and effectiveness as a manager. However, it was the truth. I offered to leave the same day if my feedback was deemed unwelcomed, and not to my surprise, I was told to indeed make it my last day. Am I upset or afraid of the future, not in the least. I know that life will never let me down as long as I do what's right. I now realize that no amount of money, person, or position is worth compromising one's own values and integrity. No one with true knoweledge of the truth of life would ask or expect another to to lie for them especially without their consent. So I learned to never ever agree to do a job I don't love just to make money. You have no idea how hard you have to work and how much you have to give up to keep such a job. Your health and wellbeing are priceless. Besides, you will never have a desire to reach for the stars because it is not your calling. Earth is definitely the school of life and everything has a design and purpose that must be followed. So how do you learn to tame that ego. It is not simple but you can start by inviting love into your heart and believing in a power bigger than yourself. Once you understand who you really are, you will know what to do and you will be guided from within by your own God-given wisdom. It takes time, faith and persistence to achieve, but it can be done. It is all up to you and only you know the quality of happiness you desire, how far in life you want to go, and with whom do you want to share your life with. The possibilities are endless, but there's an amazing path designed just for you and only you have the inner code to find it.