by Mostafizur Rahman

Created on: June 25, 2008   Last Updated: July 02, 2008

Open marriage, the modern interpretation of which is to have one's individual room for personal growth and for developing outside friendship, is a controversial term. This term arises the questions of trust, identity and equality between each partner of a marriage couple. It may bring some positive or even neutral outcomes. But in most cases, open marriage may cause serious problems like breaking of relationships of even divorce, a social curse. Such a case is happened in the life of Suman, one of my brother's colleagues.

Mr. Suman is very meritorious student from his boyhood. He has completed his secondary education in 1991. As a Bangladeshi student he got superiority from every sector of society. It is because of his being a student of Dhaka College for intermediate education. There he built an affair with Rosy, another brilliant student of Dhaka College. Out of their reciprocal interchange of passion, both of them passed the intermediate with excellent results and got admitted in the University of Dhaka.

After being admitted in the University, they got married, in July 1994, without the consent of their family. But after passing a one year happy conjugal life, they started to feel bored of each other. As a consequence, Rosy sought for another guy who can satisfy her with a vitalized appeal of sex. She got a friendship with William. Most of the time of day she liked to spend with William. Relationship started to be closer and closer. After tow or three months of their newly formed affair, they used to spend nights outside the home. As a result, Suman felt lonely and company less.

Suman knew William a little bit. Collecting all information of his wife's extramarital relationships with William, he became outrageous. He felt jealousy inside him. That's because he thought that he might be still capable of fulfilling all of the physical desire of his wife. And out of his extreme jealousy, he once attacked William in front of TSC building. It was 19:00 o'clock GMT, September 24, 1995. Suman stabbed William, which caused his immediate death.

A case had been filed against Suman in the Romna Thana. The news had been sent to the university and his admission was cancelled. Hearing this news, Rosy sent a divorce letter to him. Separation took place between them. It is a matter of sorrow that only because of violating the system of monogamy Suman's life has been spoilt. It has brought a severe disaster in his life. Now he is a vagabond after getting release from the prison. He has become a burden of society. In fact, open marriage acted as a curse in his life.

Nobody expects a life of disaster like Suman. So why should one accept open marriage? The marriage which leads to serious conflicts can never be practiced by anybody. Rather it should be prevented. Since there is a higher risk of divorce among couples who engage in extramarital sex, open marriage must be uprooted from the society. People should expect and accept the marriage and relationship built upon a higher degree trust, authenticity and intimacy.

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