by Steve Marshall

Created on: June 25, 2008

The way to live authentically is paradoxically to stop trying to protect who you are. Who you really are, never needs any protection, or any justification, in any way, whatsoever.

When we try to protect who we are, in truth, this is then presenting to someone, someone who we are not. We are pretending to be someone, who we are not. This is always the case, as the real person that we really are, never needs any protection like this. The moment we start acting from this idea of wanting to protect ourselves, we are really protecting the person that we never really are, in fact. We are protecting, and trying to maintain a falseness, or an ego self.

We are only acting from fear, because we are thinking that without this constructed and artificial person acting for us, we will never get what we want, or the other person will think less of us, in some way. The subtle reason behind this, is that we really want to control what that other person is thinking about us. But this only controls us, and prevents us from being authentically ourselves.

When we overplay our need to appear stronger than what we are, the other person will recognise this never as a strength, but will always see it as a weakness in us. The more that you demand to be recognised, or respected by others, the less likely that you will ever receive it.

This is where the psychologists use of techniques such as assertiveness training, or using various communication ploys, or the utilisation of artificially structured behaviours, falls down. They only ever really lead to another cause of your deeply held inner conflicts remaining inside of you, and actually being amplified. They grow even bigger inside of you, because another barrier to the real you has been constructed. Whether it is a barrier of "good" techniques, or 'bad" techniques, every use of such a technique, is a barrier separating you from being the really authentic you, always living now, as you, in the moment of you.

You are you, never are you only a technique. Sure, you can follow a technique, but follow it knowingly from your higher self, not from your lower self trying to be something it is not. Your lower self can never be your higher self, it is never its role to do this. It has its own role to play, assisting the higher self to gain experiences in life through its human experience.

Any self-compromising actions, or artificially constructed routines manufactured for you to follow automatically within you, is really only coming from fear, and fear

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