by Laura Harrison

Created on: June 24, 2008   Last Updated: November 08, 2011

My wife was wild. It was her very wild side that attracted me to her in the beginning. She was the product of a home without parental supervision. I came from a home where my every move was so monitored, that I was pre-programmed for bad choices.

We met each other on the night shift of our factory jobs. Factory work was about the only employment that paid a decent wage in our small country town. I was amazed that someone so small could run a fork lift, and that she would have the courage to work with almost all men.

It didn't take long for me to understand why she choose to work with a male crew. The job was not only her means to earn a living, it was her social life as well. Her name was often the topic of conversation in the men's locker room. Tales of sexual favors offered in return for help on the job. And honestly, tales of sexual favors, for nothing in return. Contrary to being appalled at the talk, I was definitely turned on. I was intrigued by this female who had no qualms about participating in relationships with my co workers. I made it my primary goal to entice her into going out with me.

Perhaps she accepted my invitation to dinner because I seemed different from the others. Maybe she went out with me because it didn't matter who she went out with at all. Whatever the reason she did start seeing me, and for a while she seemed content only with me. We were married six months into our relationship, and I just assumed she was committing to be monogamous.

Within months of our marriage, she was staying out all night. I was furious, and lit into her the first morning I caught her stumbling in the door. We talked, and she explained that there was no way she could ever be happy with one man. When I protested, she calmly pointed out that I knew exactly what she was when I married her. She said that I could decide to be happy with having a piece of her, or resign myself to not having her at all. She further stated that I was free to have relationships with other women.

Like a fool, I decided to give it a try. Her running around made me sick, but I swallowed it.
I attempted to play the game, and I did take other women out, but I just couldn't bring myself to get sexually involved. She continued to see other men on and off the job. One night, in the men's locker room, I heard a group of guys discussing things they had done with my wife the night before. I went into a rage, got into a fight with one of the men, and broke his nose, and two teeth. I wound up in the hospital with four broken ribs. i was humiliated, and ashamed of who I had become, and the lifestyle I had agreed to.

I came home to find that my wife had packed her belongings and left. Later I discovered she had left town with another man from the factory. We divorced long distance, and I eventually left town also. I don't fully understand to this day, what prompted me to accept such a bizarre arrangement. The roots of the behavior most likely stem from low self esteem. Whatever the reasons, it is a part of my past that I try desperately to forget, and to forgive myself for participating in.

Learn more about this author, Laura Harrison.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.