Having been a lifelong bachelor and a romantic, I can relate to today's more independent female sexuality in our society. This new sexual revolution began before the whole Sex and the City phenomenon, but the television series did make it more mainstream and acceptable. It has long been the case in society where men were allowed to play the field before settling down and raising a family. On the other hand, women were looked down upon if they tried to do the same thing. Women who had many sexual partners were considered sluts and whores. Nowadays, those terms apply more to women who have sexual relationships with married men, or who are prostitutes and escorts. It is no longer the case in which a more experienced woman is automatically branded unethical. However, when it comes down to a man's own personal relationship with a woman, that negative stigma still applies. A man does not want his potential future bride to be as experienced as he. There lies the double standard.
It should not be a surprise that men think one way, but settle for something else. Bad girls have always been intriguing to men. They are perceived as the fun ones. Nevertheless, they were considered not the ones to take home to mother. A twentysomething year old accountant in Sacramento agrees with this notion. The only women who he has introduced to his family have been the more professional and respectable ones. He has kept away the rugged, dreamer types. His conservative mom and dad would never accept that their nice Catholic son would ever consider dating someone with that background. Even though he is an adult, his parents still carry a large hold on him. What is a son to do? He candidly admits that he will probably end up marrying a professional woman and settle.
As I stated earlier, the more experienced woman has become more mainstream and accepted. But, the example with the accountant brings the motto "but not in my backyard" into a better perspective. In answering the question, "How free do men want their women?," I would answer it by saying that men want to be thought of as their woman's special guy. I have a couple of examples to elaborate on this explanation. A thirtysomething year old mechanic from Fairfield had conferred to me that the woman he intends to marry would want her to think of him as her knight in shining armor. He also stated the he wanted to be her best lover that she ever had. He does not want to be compared to dozens of men. A twentysomething year old male apartment
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