by Gerald Davis

Created on: June 22, 2008

Nice guys finish last. Nice guys never get the girl. You've all heard these before. I think there is a certain connotation that goes with "nice guy" that is rather negative in the dating world. What people should really say is "wimps". Wimps finish last. Wimps never get the girl. I feel like there needs to be some definition drawn between a TRULY nice guy and the "nice guys" that are thought of when it is stated.

It seems that when women think of "nice", they are really thinking boring and predictable, average, nothing special. They don't think of exciting, interesting, sexy. Nice guy equates to spineless, overly accommodating, needy, overeager. The thought is that there is no self esteem or confidence. The nice guy always seems to roll over to whatever the girl wants.

When someone wants something too badly, they give up all their strength and power in the all out attempt to attain it. This leaves them in a position of weakness and it shows. The nice guy gives up all control to the woman. She is given the reigns of you and the responsibility for all of the relationship. It is hardly a position of strength and confidence. It is hardly exciting in any way. All value is lost in her eyes as a worthy man. Again, WIMP! Call it what it is.

A TRULY nice guy is a confident man, a considerate man, an honest man. He is respectful of women, but he does not put them up on a pedestal to be worshipped. He adores women, but he does not center his universe around them and has plenty of interests and activities outside of a relationship. He will do nice things for women, but he does not mortgage in life to shower her with gifts or put his life on hold to try and help solve all her problems. Hell make time for his woman, but will not rearrange his entire life to try and spend every waking moment with her.

A TRULY nice guy will tell the truth, even at the risk it might upset a woman. He does not change his beliefs to fit what the woman wants. He does not act differently around his woman than he does at any other time. He does not treat people differently dependant on whether his woman is around. The way he speaks to you is basically the same as he speaks to everybody. A TRULY nice guy is a man of consistent character and morals.

Some other ways to tell a TRULY nice guy from a wimp. TRULY nice guys have their finances in order, whereas wimps are either of control financially. TRULY nice guys are successful in what they do (meaning they do what they do well, not necessarily that they are the CEO), wimps often do things less well and brown nose their way with others who have charge over what they do. TRULY nice guys know how to make a decision and stick with it, wimps often seem to be blown about by the wind and often flip flop on things.

Becoming a TRULY nice guy and not being a wimp will lead you to being a more attractive man, a more desired man, and in the end, no longer a single man. No longer will you hear, "well, you're a nice guy, but I'm only interested in being friends." You will be hearing, "Yes, I'd love to go out with you."

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