by Alissa King

Created on: December 31, 2006   Last Updated: April 23, 2007

When is a haircut not just a haircut? Hair can be a deeply emotional topic for women, especially when loss of hair correlates to loss of health, freedom, or sexual identity. Jewish women in Nazi Germany had their heads shaved while being processed for concentration camps. Women who undergo chemotherapy endure terrible pain and sickness, but it is the loss of their hair that is often referred to. Hair is shaved or close cropped before entering an institution such as the military or monastery. There are utilitarian reasons behind this, but it is also a way of suppressing personal identity; in both the military and the monastery, personal desires and free initiative are suppressed so that an individual can serve an authority besides the self. Hair clearly has deeper meaning to human beings than a mere accessory. So what does it mean when women cut off their hair during a break up?

There are several possible reasons for the break up haircut. One idea follows the adage "Living well is the best revenge." Usually a break up haircut marks a startling change in appearance. The result of the style may be a more modern or professional look. A good hair cut is striking especially on a face with good bone structure. So is the break up haircut simply a technique for showing the ex-boyfriend what they are missing and attracting a new mate?

I don't believe this explains it. Hair is deeply sensual. When a woman cuts off her hair, attracting the opposite sex is probably furthest from her mind. Short, chic hair is a lot more likely to declare personal independence than to signify interest in dating. Also from personal experience, the dramatic haircut following the break-up is not a vanity based choice made at leisure. There comes a day when you feel that you really have to cut it off. This would signal underlying emotional reasons as opposed to a fashion statement.

I came to a point where I did not want to have my long locks for a single moment more. This had to do directly with my distress and unhappiness at the time. When I went for the haircut, it was very personal. I felt like I was changing more than my appearance; I was taking the needed step to get on with my life. In a way I felt I was cutting off something I had held close for a long time, something that had become unbearable.

So I sat down in a beauty salon and issued in a new start. I think that is the reason women cut off their hair: The chance to begin anew. The break-up hair cut is a way for the outer self to express a transition taking place under the skin. Tattoos can express a similar form of transition, as can moving to a new place or changing jobs. When you wear your changes on your body, that is the most personal way of expressing change.

When I look at the 'before' pictures, I see that I had beautiful hair. Unfortunately, it brought me no pleasure. Maybe I will have long hair again one day. Meanwhile, there is no room for regrets. My short hair mirrors my optimistic attitude. I can feel the breeze on my neck as I work and play. It's been a long time since I could feel the wind moving around me, and it is comforting to have a tactile sense of change.

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