by Susan Zalenski

Created on: June 22, 2008   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

I haven't had the opportunity to travel to Hawaii yet, which if and when I do may become pretty high on my favorite vacation memory list. So, I think for right now I will choose going to my sister's home in Michigan when I was a teenager. Hmmm, sounds kind of humdrum right from the start, but that's where you are mistaken. I visited with my sister Chrissie and her husband Dick most every summer after they were married, up until they moved back to Pennsylvania near myself. I still love to visit and treat myself to mini-vacations at their home. These visits have given me some of the most cherished memories of my life. And for that I'm grateful.

You have to know my sister to appreciate this but in a nutshell I'll try to explain. Though she had kids of her own Chrissie always made time for me. She was fun to be around and tried to make sure there was at least some normalcy to my young life. I'm not going to go into any detail here, I don't think it's necessary, but I do think it is important for you to know there was much dysfunction in my own home. And I think I may be the luckiest person in the world despite that fact, because I have a sister that has given me unconditional love for many years.

I had great times, playing with my nieces and nephews, going shopping, swimming, just hanging out at home. She took care of me and made sure that the comforts I had never really known were readily available for me at her home. Every day I spent there was a holiday! We visited my Aunt in Ohio, went to Houghton Lake in the upper part of the state and just spent time talking. In my eyes I looked up to my sister with admiration that was not surpassed by anyone or anything else, she was my hero.

Times change and people change, my sister became seriously ill about ten years ago and I was so frightened that I may lose her. I wasn't the best of sisters at that time but I didn't know how to handle the changes in her. The most vibrant person I had ever known might die and I didn't want anyone to know that I thought I might be dying too, just in a different way. I became impulsive and acted out on situations that could and did cause me harm. I took risks because I didn't care about myself. In retrospect, I firmly believe I was running away from the pain I had inside and the inability to cope with her illness. I was lost and an enormous emptiness consumed me.

My sister recovered after a long and life threatening battle and she still had the strength to help me face my battle of a different nature. She was the epitome of courage and grace, and she always made time for me, time that she probably didn't really have but never said so. She had recovered and would give me her shoulder to lean on to begin my recovery too.

As I said before, Hawaii looks pretty good at times, and if I ever get the chance to go I'm certain it will be the best of times. Sunshine, beaches, the beautiful sights to see all sound wonderful. But deep down in my heart I know it will never replace those summers with my sister and her family. That's where I have memories that live on forever and still give me a sense of peace and joy. These are memories of being with my dearest sister and they still grow with each new moment that I spend with her.

Learn more about this author, Susan Zalenski.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.