by -Rakuyou Mitsukai-

Created on: June 20, 2008

While the question here is very vague (as in not specifically defining if this is a one-time cheater, a repeat offender, or if they cheated on someone else and not the person being asked the question) the answer is simply no.

Do some of these people deserve a second chance? yes, that case can be made. Are we taught to forgive those who hurt us? Again the answer is yes. The fatal problem in all of this is that we can forgive, but forgetting is a whole different story. Let's look at some scenarios involving the different instances I mentioned above starting with the easiest target, the repeat offender.

With a repeat offender, it becomes obvious this person will not be stopped from engaging in promiscuous activity. What the person being cheated on will think is that "This person does not care about me," and that will be the end of that relationship.

In the instance that someone is cheated on once it is slightly different. The psychological process is thrown off because the person in the relationship is reluctant to trust the cheater because they are unsure if they will turn into a repeat offender. How does this make a difference though? With a repeat offender, you know for certain that they can't be trusted, but a one-time offender, who knows? It causes more tension in the relationship because the person who was cheated on is always going to be anticipating the worst. This brings us to my first lesson of relationships: "A relationship without trust is like a plane without wings, even if you've somehow gotten it off the ground, it's still doomed to crash and burn."

Finally, let's look at the case that the person being asked this question is in a relationship with someone who cheated on another person. This person has less reason to distrust the person in the relationship since they themselves haven't been a victim of cheating. This relationship will deal with a different kind of tension than the last instance. This relationship will face criticism and speculation from others. When this kind of negative aura surrounds a relationship, it might not always end the relationship but it can definitely cause a rift to form between the people it involves and sometimes that's all it takes.

There are always exceptions and there's no saying that every cheater is going to lose their relationship but more often than not, it truly is that the types of relationships do not work out.

Learn more about this author, -Rakuyou Mitsukai-.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.