by Natalie Case

Created on: June 19, 2008   Last Updated: January 19, 2009

The entire concept of marriage as a "sacred institution" is a modern fallacy. Marriage has evolved and changed over the centuries, thank goodness, and the whole modern understanding of marriage is a far cry from it's earliest origins.

Of course, there are far more issues that feed this argument than that of just marriage. There's the idea of whether or not homosexuality (or any other sexuality beyond straight heterosexuality) is "natural" or "healthy". There's the religious side of things. There's the baby-making side.

There's also a lot of fear and animosity born of fear.

Let's look at the words "sacred institution" for a moment. To believe that marriage is this "sacred" entity, we have to first determine, sacred to who? If sacred is a religious term, then it applies to those adherents of that religion. So in the eyes of those who hold this up as an argument against same-gender marriage, it must logically assume that they do not see anyone of other religions as married as well, right?

So if Joe Christian holds his marriage as sacred and John Muslim holds his marriage sacred, but neither of them recognizes the other's marriage, where does that leave the institution?

Marriage has a long and sordid history that has little to do with anything sacred. It was a way to secure a legacy, to pass down the land and titles, to join countries and enemies, to broker treaties or start wars. Marriage for love was almost unheard of, and most who were not titled or moneyed didn't even bother with the concept in any formal way.

The church only got involved because the church ran everything. They had their fingers in all the pies, so to speak.

Anyone who thinks that there were no homosexuals back then, is sorely mistaken. In some societies there was a level of acceptance even, as long as the man or woman did their husbandly or wifely duty and made babies the way they were supposed to, of course.

But times changed and society moved away from what it had been, and marriage became less about business and more about family. I guess this is when the concept of marriage as sacred developed in our modern culture. People marry for love (well, we can hope most do anyway).

Marriage is about so much more than sex. It's about a partnership. It's about family. It's about love that changes people, that changes the lives of those involved. It's work and it's messy and it's wonderful. With any luck at all, it's about love.

What difference does it make whether it's a man and a woman or two men or two women? What possible difference can it make to anyone other than those who have been denied the simple right of joining their lives to the one that they love?

Marriage as a heterosexuals only institution once made sense. Then again, so did attacking another village and carrying off some unwilling bride after clubbing her on the head. But, we're past the time when we need every living couple to procreate. In fact, we're rapidly approaching a place in time where we should be encouraging couples to not procreate.

You want a sacred marriage? That's wonderful I support you one hundred percent. Let that marriage be between you, your chosen partner and your chosen god. The rest of us only want the same.

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