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How to say no to people without stressing yourself out

comes at you with a weekend bathroom re-modeling project, it doesn't merit canceling your plans, even if they are far more pleasant. You're probably a hard working model citizen who deserves every break you can get, am I right?

Friends won't always be knocking on your door for a favor they may simply want to spend time with you, or have issues shopping without someone to share their opinions with. In this case, don't feel guilty simply decline with care. Keep your word on previous engagements, but don't drop everything and grab your purse when they show up looking for an escort to IKEA. This will only teach them that you'll be a reliable resort whether or not they bother to check up on your plans in advance. Declining firmly but pleasantly will ideally inspire the other party to make plans far ahead of time, so you're not cramming them in at the last second (or declining entirely).

You don't want acquaintances to feel neglected, of course, so if you don't have the time or interest to dedicate to their invitations, you might throw one their way next time you're headed to a party or having a group date with friends. And obviously, agree to their invitations that compel you if you have time. That will let them know you're enthused about their company, but not willing to make a habit of it. It will also clue them in on your interests, so their next invitation will be more relevant to you and less inspiring to toss in the garbage.

A meaningful ceremony or commemoration event should be given a higher consideration, but if you feel you've received an invitation out of pure civility rather than sentiment, you're not out of line to reply with the "will not attend" box checked. Send a gift, wish the celebrated party well, and any lingering guilt will dissipate once you're spending your weekend catching up on your own matters, with people who value your presence.

Finally, make it a rule to schedule in relaxation or personal time (which could be used to regroup mentally or clean your studio whatever you need to start the week on a clean page), and don't break this obligation to yourself! You are by no means forced to say "yes" to anyone, unless you're forcing yourself. Realize this detriment to your sanity, and catch yourself before you agree to that next invitation.

Learn more about this author, Michelle Christina.
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