by Jessica Gordon

Created on: December 29, 2006   Last Updated: April 23, 2007

Abuse comes in many forms, the main three being verbal, physical, and sexual. Often times, abuse starts out small, then escalates into something so destructive and terrifying that the abused is too afraid to get out of the relationship. There are many warning signs of an abusive partner, some are easy to tell, others are not.

Verbal abuse is often downplayed as the 'minor' form of abuse, but it can be just as damaging. It can also be subtle. If a man asks a woman, "Don't you realize that ever word you say is ,well, sort of stupid?" He makes it out to be helpful, but really he's just attacking his partner with words. Same can go for women. If a woman proclaims, "God, can't you ever get anything right? You're such an idiot!" She is trying to make her partner feel bad, though she might not be able to hurt him physically.

When it comes to slaps, punches, and all other forms of physical abuse, it usually results after a period of verbal abuse. This is a tactic of the abuser, to wear down the self-esteem of the abused until the will to fight back is no longer existent. When this sort of abuse starts, the abused will find themselves isolated, as most abusers will keep their victims away from anyone but themselves with vicious selfishness. Abusers are often very possessive and illogically jealous.

Sex can become a violent act in an abusive relationship. To 'make-up' for the physical abuse, women will sometimes be raped by their partners. Also, they are subjected to humiliating acts in the bedroom to please their 'lover'. Rape and all the forms of sexual assault can leave horrific scars upon a woman's psyche, causing all sorts of mental illnesses.

If you have been abused in any of these ways, get out of your relationship. Call someone you trust to get you out of the house and take you somewhere safe. File a police report. Yes, you love him or her, but if he or she loved you, wouldn't they trust you, and protect you? Even from themselves? If anyone notices mysterious bruises on their loved ones or friends, try and talk them out of it, or get other people involved. Don't just stand there, so something before something happens that can never be undone.

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