by Rachel Rositano

Created on: June 15, 2008

Shattered Glass

My heart shattered into a thousand pieces of silver glass. I peered into each one, hoping to find a truth buried within, a reason for the crumbling walls inside of me, but all that the mirror-like shards reflected was you. Your eyes, your lips, that patient smile.
I fell deeper into a nothingness composed of the dreams of your touch and felt every piece of me you brushed against burn like a bitter acid. I tried to escape but you held me tightly, keeping me close when all I wanted to do was to forget

Your eyes, shining with a magnanimous light. When we're alone I can fall into those eyes like an ocean. Then she enters the room and they inevitably drift away, leaving me damp and shivering. Your lips, your patient smile. Those same lips, pressed against hers in the back room, when I'd stumbled in to fetch my coat.
Falling past pained memories I entered a black pit, still holding the gathered pieces of my glass heart, trying vainly to put them back together.
I wasn't alone in this dark hole, however. You were standing there, waiting for me, those eyes as warm as ever, and that smile set in place. My eyes filled with liquid pearls at the sight, because I knew then that I'd never see anything more than patience.
My shattered heart fell at your feet, but you took no notice, treading over the crystal pieces as you took a step closer.
Tread softly, my love.
But you must have been stomping, for even as you opened your mouth to speak I felt my heart being ground into the pavement.
You asked me to keep your secret- not tell anyone else what I saw. You didn't need to worry- I've lost the ability to speak. My will disappeared the moment my heart shattered and now, thanks to your careless feet, that's been broken beyond repair.
And so I nodded mutely.
Your eyes lit, and momentarily the agony in my soul was appeased- that I could for an instant cause you any joy. Then you turned away without a second thought, disappearing from the pit and returning to your love.
Slowly I knelt down in the dirt and began to pick out the tiny remnants of my heart, piecing them back together one by one.
One day it might be complete again- a long, long time from now. Yet glass that's been broken always looks a bit cracked, and it will never be the same, no matter how I weld it.
I still see you in the broken pieces, love, although you'll never know it. Even though you're hers. Even though I'm broken.
Time heals all wounds, but it doesn't fix shattered glass.

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