by Willow Breeze

Created on: June 13, 2008   Last Updated: October 01, 2010

Smiles, frowns, ups, and downs. That is what relationships are all about.

What starts off as the greatest thing can sometimes be the worst thing. What starts out on the wrong foot can sometimes end up being the one true and sure thing. How do we know? You have to love, and trust that the person you are giving yourself too, is doing the same.

Everyone is different, all relationships are different. We all have morals, integrity, values, and a certain something extra we look for in a person that we choose to have a relationship with.

You have to be upfront from the very beginning when you start a relationship. Don't hold back and expect the person to be a mind reader that is not fair to them or to you. For them it is not fair to have to guess at how you want the relationship to work, or what it is you expect them to do to make you happy. For you it isn't fair to have to guess what they may be looking for, you should not have to walk on egg shells thinking what if this isn't what they want? So both parties need to be upfront and say I am looking for someone who is honest, reliable, believes in whatever it is that you are comfortable with, and you aren't looking to change one another.

Once you begin changing and making the person into someone they are not I find that is when a lot of arguments come into play. You can't take people away from who or what they are, and you can't make them give up their hobbies or things that make them who they are.

Respect one another and respect that you each had a life before becoming a couple.

You will know when your relationship has run its course. You will have the feeling of nauseousness that overwhelms you at the thought of having to spend time with this person, you many even get anxiety panic attacks at the thought of having to deal with this individual.

You just have to remember honesty is what you were looking for and you have to give honesty to this person. You want to be firm that you are no longer wanting to be a part of this relationship and be specific so there are no lingering questions as to why, what did I do, is there something I can fix? You want a clean break with no reason to have to deal with this person again. It is up to you if you remain friends with the person but remember not all couples who part can remain friends without some kind of complication.

If you choose to be friends remember you can't get jealous at the thought of the other person dating, you don't want to say anything about their new partner, and you have to be respectful. Relationships are hard. Nobody should ever have to be in one that makes them uncomfortable. Do not let the guilt trips hold you there, if you feel that you can't get out of the relationship without some kind of hostile reaction from the other party seek help. Talk to a counselor or when you know it is the end and you feel you may be in danger make sure you have someone there to back you up if necessary.

Relationships can be wonderful. They can make you daydream, fantasize, and put a smile on your face all day. Your heart races, you get giddy. That is a great feeling. However it can make you sad, cry, say mean things, and just be a person that nobody wants to be around. So don't let yourself be that way end it when you feel there is no other option.

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