by Andrea Bois

Created on: June 09, 2008

Great memories are forever mine to keep. Is eloquent synchronicity only coincidence or something deliberate, far beyond our comprehension?

Can one's greatest loss become one's greatest gift? My greatest loss has indeed become my greatest gift.

It's been two years and nearly four months now since I watched the love-of-my-life take his last breath in my arms. Since then I have grown a lot. Gus took such good care of me, he handled everything. Now I have to do it all myself. Being on my own, without his constant unconditional love and support has forced me to seek approval from only myself, and to rely on only myself. This has given me all new self confidence and purpose.

In the beginning it was more than just overwhelming, it was down right impossible. I didn't make any jewelry for a full year after his death. Gus was my inspiration and my biggest fan and I kept thinking I needed a new muse, but you know what? I have become my own muse. I have learned to tune into what I like, and what I want, and what I know.

This is the second greatest gift I've ever received, second only to my Gus' love.

The Hotel where I work has bought hundreds of dollars worth of my hand made jewelry to sell in the gift shop. All because I MADE it happen. I took my new found self confidence, and the knowledge that one incredible man adored me and thought me talented and smart, and I stood tall in my power and demanded my due.

Thank you Gus, I'm forever grateful for your many lessons in life! You shall forever remain the sunshine of my life and my hero. Meeting you in that small town in the middle of nowhere and us falling in love at first sight was the greatest synchronicity of my life.

Recently another loss brought the terrible loss of my husband Gus rushing back all too vividly. It happened last December when I lost my Toyota Tercel. It was 13 years old and I was the original owner. It was the only car I've ever had that I bought new.

Another driver ran a stop sign five blocks from my house hitting my car broadside on the driver's side door, spinning me out to slam back end first into a light pole across the street.
I was really lucky and only sustained severe whiplash that my Chiropractor is still treating twice weekly. My car was not so lucky; she gave her life for me. She was totaled. OUCH, my poor little car, I will miss that car so much.

The loss is extra tough because memories of Gus were still living as strongly inside of her as they do in me. His hard hat still rode on the back

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