by Raven Lebeau

Created on: June 07, 2008

I'll assume that, in the title of this article, the adjective "bad" modifies the noun "ideas" rather than the plural noun "fathers". After all, an article about gifts for bad fathers would be rather useless. Who wants to get a gift in recognition of something one has done badly? However, for those whose fathers are at least adequate, an article aimed at steering one away from bad gift ideas could be worth its word count in gold. (Notice I didn't specify a unit on the gold)

I could give you a simple list of bad gifts, but undoubtedly a few would slip my mind. Hence, it seems more prudent to provide you with some guidelines on how to identify bad gift ideas. If you can answer "yes" to any of the following questions about your gift idea, toss it out and go back to the proverbial drawing board.

1. Is it used for something Dad hates to do?

My husband, for example, hates mowing the lawn. A set of mower blades, therefore, would be a reminder of that abhorrent activity and thus not conducive to a festive holiday. On the other hand, a gift that eliminates that hated chore, such as the hiring of a reasonably priced lawn service for the summer, is likely to move a man to tears of joy.

Perhaps the men on your Fathers' Day gift list love mowing the lawn and would be thrilled with shiny new mower blades. Maybe it's personal finance that gets their boxers in a ruffle. In that case, steer clear of books about investing or stock analysis software. Get the idea?

2. Is it an article of clothing bereft of witty slogans and appropriate team logos?

Slacks and polo shirts are useful, practical, and just plain boring. Don't go there.

On the other hand, if your dad happens to be an avid fan of, say, the KU Jayhawks, a National Championship tee shirt might be a big hit. A shirt with a clever quip that will have your dad's buddies chuckling might be a nice idea too, but only if you understand your dad's sense of humor.

3. Is it something he won't have time to enjoy?

I bought my husband a couple of video games for Christmas, and they both sat on the shelf for several months. Swamped with work, he had no time to delve into the world of Harry Potter or cross swords in Bleach: Shattered Blade. In the past few weeks, he has enjoyed the games, but at the time, they were only a reminder of what he felt he had to set aside in order to succeed. Books, fishing rods, woodworking tools, sports equipment, and moves or TV series all fall in this same category. Make sure it's something that your dad will enjoy now. Your idea may be good, just not at this time.

4. Is it an insult masquerading as a gift?

My mother (I kid you not!) gave my dad a nose hair trimmer for Christmas. Luckily for her, he has a sense of humor. Exercise equipment, books on self-improvement and items designed for organizing things all fall under this same category.

5. Is it something you wish he'd use/wear/do but can't get him to?

Maybe your dad needs to wake up and realize it's the silicon age. However, if he still has a paper appointment book, getting him a PDA probably won't be appreciated. If he likes to hire a handyman for home repair, then a fully equipped toolbox isn't the way to go. You may think he'd look slick with a new haircut, but don't expect him to jump on a gift certificate for your favorite salon. You can teach an old dog new tricks, but only if he wants to learn them. You can't force fashion, technology, or hobbies on someone.

Now that you know the cardinal sins of Fathers' Day gift giving, you can rest assured that your gifts will be appreciated. It's always hard to find that "perfect gift", but as long as you can answer "no" to the questions above, you know you're on the right track.

Learn more about this author, Raven Lebeau.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.