by Gary Maclean

Created on: June 07, 2008   Last Updated: June 01, 2011

I'm a Dad and have been since my first wife, had her first baby, by me. I am also a Grampa and have been ever since one of my children had their first baby. I, probably like many other Dads, can always appreciate a gift. They are fun, mysterious and just plain exciting.

I, probably like other Dad's, love my children before life itself. But, let's not confuse the two. My deep, sincere love for my children has nothing to do with what they "gift" me. Of course I will love them forever; I may not love some of the gifts they give me, but I will most certainly love them, they can't escape that.

I'm a simple guy, I like most anything. A good gift could be simply a plate of chocolate chip cookies or a pot of beef stroganoff; I'm not difficult. But there are things I would really rather not have my children get me for Father's Day, or for any other occasion for that matter.

It wasn't all that easy to think of "BAD" Father's Day gifts, because I am such an easygoing guy. I did manage to come up with ten things I could do without though. Here is my list of ten bad Father's Day gifts;

10) PASTEL COLOR CLOTHES: Pink shirts, white belt, yellow sweater, sky blue shorts; come on, I'm a man, not a boutique bon bon. Kids, you might think your Dad would look great in that light yellow sweater, but let him choose his own "light side", if he is going to have one, OK?

9) DECK TREATMENT: Sure, I know it's expensive and I know my decks need it, but I don't want to do it. If you really want to get me a present, get the stuff then treat my decks for me. I'm not going to do it anyway; I'm too old for that kind of stuff. Save your money.

8) WALLET: I have an impression in my butt that has been worn in over the past 50 years. I need to select my own wallet. I need a special fit. Nothing extravagant, I'm not looking for alligator or anything, just a good fit and a good hold.

7) PEN: I am nearly 60 years old. I have pens. I have been writing for over 50 of those 60 years. I don't care how pretty pens are today, they still do the same thing they did when I got my first pen - write. No pens please.

6) LARGE CERAMIC STATUES: In fact, no ceramic statues at all. Maybe your Mother would like that big German Shepherd Dog sitting peacefully on his hind haunches but I prefer my living, 15 year old, Heinz 57 brand, hound dog. I don't know what to do with anything ceramic anyway, break it?

5) BOOZE: I don't like the suggestion, I don't like the thought, I don't even like the image of

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