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Victims of abuse: When enough is enough

by Rhonda Erickson

Created on: June 02, 2008

"When Your Knight In Shinning Armor Breaks More Than Your Heart."

At seventeen years old I married my childhood sweetheart. His name was Tommy, and he was tall and handsome, with shoulder length white blond hair, and piercing deep blue eyes,that melted my heart like butter everytime he looked at me. He had the sexiest Brad Pitt grin, enhanced by seductively full lips and shapely straight, white teeth. His body was lean and muscular, and just the way he walked gave him an air of self control and confidence. He not only had more sex appeal and physical attraction than the law should allow, but also possessed a provocative charisma that could charm the pants off a grizzly bear at fifty feet. A deadly combination when mixed with the explosive, violent temper and rage hidden deep inside the soul of a man, resulting from a grossly dysfunctional and abusive childhood.

I fell in love with Tommy when I was in the seventh grade. From that time on we were pretty much inseparable. We went to every dance and school function together, and spend afternoons at my house doing homework together. My parents were not very optimistic when at sixteen I told them we were engaged and planning to get married. They tried hard to persuade me to date other guys, and reconsider the choice I was making. That only resulting in making me more determined, and the following summer we ran away and got married.

By this time I already knew about his childhood. His father got really mean when he drank, seldom worked and had spent several stretches in jail for burglary and family violence. His mother worked all the time, had very little patients with her three sons, and was not completely faithful to his father. My parents, on the other hand, were quite the opposite.

Tommy and I both got jobs, and our own apartment. He decided to quit school, and I went back that fall, as promised to my parents, for my senior year. Going to school, working, and being married was hard. Tommy liked to party, and was unhappy when I was too tired or busy to go somewhere with him. He started having people over all hours of the day and night, drinking and doing drugs. When I said something about it, he told me I was being a nag just like his mother. He said that was why his Dad drank all the time, and also the reason his Mom got her mouth slapped shut on many occasions. I knew Tommy had a temper, we had some pretty heated arguments over the years, even before we got married, but he had never threatened to hit me before.

Along

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