by Madison West

Created on: May 31, 2008   Last Updated: June 10, 2008

As a child, gardening was always a part of our family life. My earliest gardening memory consists of a hole I dug at the age of four. Age and time prevent me from remembering if the seeds I placed in my "garden" hole ever produced anything, but I can still remember the feeling of anticipation I had, waiting for that first sign of life. Even when we lived in an apartment, my parents would take me and my younger sister along to help with a plot that they tended at a community garden. When we later moved into our house, the gardening continued in the backyard. While Dad would concentrate on the vegetable garden, Mom was always planting something new in her flower gardens and whiskey barrels.

Other than the innocent pleasure I received from digging that first hole, I usually looked at gardening as a chore. I can remember those days at the community garden as being unusually hot and sweaty. Though I would sometimes allow myself to actually enjoy the experience, for the most part, I quickly outgrew the desire to hoe, weed, till, or plant.

There comes a time in our lives when everything just seems boring. I believe they call this "the teenage years." It was in those years that I saw gardening as something that "old" people did, either because they lived in the "country" like my great-grandmother or they just didn't have anything better to do. I assumed that my parents fit into the latter category, or both. I mean, why else would Mom continue planting her petunias or geraniums in her whiskey barrels, just to have to shoo our dog, Daisy May, out of them every morning? What was the point or enjoyment in that?

During my teen years, whatever enjoyment, pleasure or desire I had ever felt for gardening was redirected towards a totally different activity...BOYS! But, as ironic as life often is, it is my love of boys that eventually led me back to a love for gardening.

You see, boys lead to dating. Dating leads to marriage. In my case, marriage led to divorce and divorce led me right back to gardening.

Divorce, as many well know, is one of the most painful experiences that life can bring. It is a death of a relationship and leaves so many in its path wounded and in need of healing. Healing is exactly what gardening gave me.

The months following my divorce, were filled with depression, sense of loss, and hopelessness. They were also filled with plenty of anger and resentment. I took advantage of all the usual "post-divorce" treatments. You know...seeing a counselor, crying, screaming,

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