I wake up with a start. I'm not sure why but then I realize that the next door neighbors white fluff ball is scratching on the glass door. It sees me and starts yapping.
Just perfect. Nap time cut short because of this pathetic excuse for a dog.
I scowl and slowly rise from my cushion, stretching my body out lazily. Oh well....time to eat anyway.
I saunter to the kitchen and do a bowl inspection. There's water, but that's about it. Honestly, you'd think my maid would be better trained by now!
Circling the kitchen, I lustily cry for her. It takes a couple of minutes but then there she is, rushing over to where I stand.
"Oh, Porsha, I'm so sorry honey. You're hungry aren't you?"
I sniff disdainfully and glare at her. Whaddyayoureckonlady?
And here it comes. Food, glorious food. I give her ankles a caress as I pass through her legs, all forgiven.
But wait! I smell something! Is that....tuna?
I sniff the plate delicately and almost dry retch. Tuna? You're giving me tuna?
She must see the horror in my eyes because she reaches down and pats my head as if to comfort me.
"I'm sorry Porsha, but that's it I'm afraid. I'll go out later and get you some of the good stuff but for now...."
I glare at her and stalk away from the plate. What does she think I am? I can't eat that..that ....MUCK!
I really am hungry though. I run through my options. There's old Mrs Goochman two doors down. She always leaves some milk out for me. Then there was the kid in the park...whatshisname...he always had ham sandwiches on him from school.
I run through a few others that are suckers for my cuteness and am almost out the door when I come face to face with that damn yapper that they call a dog. Looks more like a mouse with long hair to me but...whatever.
It was still scratching at the glass door. What the heck...? It was a stupid little thing, easy to scare. An un-needed disturbance though, I think resentfully.
I jump on the window ledge and give mouse boy an eyeful. It continues making way too much noise for my liking. Pretending to be tough.
"Hsst. Shuuut up!" I yell, leaping off the sill in one fluid motion.
The yaps turn to yips of terror as mouse boy takes off as fast as its tiny stumps can take it.
Ok then. Time to get some food.
I saunter down the road towards the park. I can see the school bus pulling up so I'm right on target. The crush of children exit the bus and for a moment I can't see anything but legs. And then , I spot 'the boy' heading towards a park bench.
"Kitty, kitty, kitty. Here kitty" 'the boy' has seen me too. And he's holding some ham in his outstretched hand. Hallelujah!
Oh boy am I hungry! I reach out to gently take the piece of meat from his hand, but suddenly his face changes as he looks over my head.
"Oh damn. She's here already." He throws the meat towards me as well as a couple of other sandwiches from his bag. "Have to go. See you the next time"
I eat my spoils greedily and decide to stop at Mrs Goochmans house on the way home. heck why not! Milk would be a pleasant addition to end a tiring day.
Home again.
No sign of the promised 'good stuff' yet but I'm too tired to care. My belly is full for the moment, my lounge chair is beckoning and everybody else can go get stuffed.
This is my time. Deal with it.
Learn more about this author, Jacinta Hall.
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