by Danine Manette

Created on: May 29, 2008   Last Updated: May 30, 2008

Revenge, should you or shouldn't you? This question has been asked and debated time and time again by infidelity victims. For some reason, victims feel as though they need to cause just as much pain to their husband, and especially to the other woman, as was caused them. Victims spend in inordinate amount of time fantasizing about how and when to exact the perfect revenge. Some methods of revenge merely cause interruption to the cheater and his lovers lives while other methods are much more destructive. Often times, the thought of revenge and the fantasizing which follows are far more satisfying than the act itself. The mere image of the other woman being mowed down by a locomotive or of the husband being publicly tarred and feathered is usually enough to satisfy most women's need for revenge. But what about the ones who do follow through with it? Wouldn't you suspect they'd feel better having the opportunity to witness the pain and suffering of the ones who caused them such agony? Well, you might be surprised to learn that those who seek revenge usually don't feel any better and actually feel worse.

Let's look at this logically. Since it's easier to envision the other woman as the target of torture, we will begin with her. As for the other woman, she is going to experience an unimaginable amount of anger and pain if you and your husband reconcile. Remember, in most cases she wanted your man, wanted to be you, and wanted to have everything that you have. Most other women aren't happy in the position of "secret call girl", regardless of the image they portray. No woman in her right mind wants to be hidden in the closet while the wife enjoys the luxury of being in the spotlight. Therefore, if you and your husband reconcile, she is either sent packing or submerged farther down into the pit of the unclaimed. Now, you might be thinking, "Who cares about her or how she feels? She knew the job was dangerous when she took it!" Assuming she was aware she was involved with a married man, it is not unreasonable for the victim wife to be unsympathetic as to the other woman's pain. However, it must be noted that the other woman is indeed in pain, often abandoned, and left feeling used and unwanted. Isn't that enough satisfaction for the victim wife? The other woman especially looks like a fool if she introduced your husband to her family and friends, and now is left all alone and lonely. The fact of the matter is, if you and your husband reconcile and go on to have a happy,

• 1
• 2
• 3
• Next Page >>