"You know were part of the eighties when you have to make a conscious choice not to say 'gag me with a spoon'," I laughed as a friend and I compared our teenage experiences in the 1980s. "I have to be careful because my daughter repeats everything I say."
"At least you won't be buying jellies," my friend replied.
I remember wearing jellies, those plastic shoes every girl had to have if she was a part of the in-crowd. I hated those shoes and I still do. They were ugly and uncomfortable. How I ever convinced myself to wear them baffles me. Oh, the power of peer pressure!
Twister beads was something else that reminds me of the eighties. I loved those. I would still wear them, if I could find them somewhere. I remember mixing, matching and twisting these must-have accessories and wearing them day after day. I had a special necklace rack that I used to store nothing else but my twister beads. Maybe they are still packed away, with my cheerleading uniform and my Madonna tapes.
Yes, there was Madonna. She wasn't my artist of the decade. I much preferred Sheena Easton over the Material Girl. I still love her music, but for more mature reasons. Her voice is pure and her range is magnificent. I remember when her single "Sugar Walls" was put on Tipper Gore's "filthy fifteen list." I wonder what the former second lady thinks of today's music. Her list would now be called the "filthy fifteen thousand list." You definitely know you were a part of the eighties when you still consider Sheena Easton to be one of the greatest voices of all time.
"He looks like someone who would tamper with children," my grandmother told me when she saw a picture of Michael Jackson in one of my many teen magazines. I had no idea what she meant by "tamper with," but many years later I realized exactly what she meant. My grandmother always had a gift for knowing things long before anyone else did.
"Do you remember Luke and Laura?" my friend asked me as our conversation continued.
Yes, I remember them. I wasn't really into that couple. He was, after all, a rapist. I preferred Robert and Holly, who came on the Port Charles scene a few years later. There was also Steve (Patch) and Kayla from "Days of Our Lives." I had no idea that their popularity would cause the mass numbers of Kaylas to be applying for college in the past few years. I never considered naming my child after a soap opera character, though many not only considered it, but went ahead and named their baby girls after Salem's resident good girl.
I did name my Cabbage Patch doll Robbie Nichole, after Robert Scorpio of General Hospital. Her original name was too strange not to change. As her adoptive mom, I had to be sure she had a decent name. Looking back, I don't know how decent of a name Robbie Nichole was, but I do know it was much better than Eunice Ursula. I was probably too old to have a Cabbage Past doll, but they were so ugly I had to have one. Even as a teen, I was always working for the underdog.
I wanted to participate in "Hands Across America," but we lived too far away from any major cities that were participating. I did buy the "We Are the World" single. I would cry when I thought of all the people, especially the children, starving in Africa. I had no idea of the genocide that would become the major news story decades later.
I discovered my love for politics in the eighties as I helped my parents campaign for Ronald Reagan. I really liked him, mostly because he reminded me of my grandfather. "Well," he would begin his speeches and answers to questions at press conferences. My grandfather did that, too. As I studied him later in my life, I discovered he really did have a lot in common with my grandfather. It still amazes me that they were both stolen from this world by Alzheimer's disease.
Speaking of politics, we all remember Oliver North. I never did figure out why he was on trial. He was just a colonel, what could he have possibly known about all of the Iran Contra business? As I listened to the recent debates as to whether or not Iraq had weapons of mass destructions I had one thought, "If they look around the White House, I'm sure they will find a receipt for WMDs." We were so anti-Iran that we became pro-Iraq during their war, I'm sure they sold them some type of weapons to defeat the country who held our citizens hostage for all those months.
"What color was your Swatch?" my friend asked me.
It was pink, of course. I had the little plastic "protectors" that crossed the watch's face to keep it from getting scratched. My Swatch had to be pink - it had to match all the menswear I was wearing at the time. My mom was very strict that I not "dress like a boy," so all of my ties and vests were pink and lacey or some other Easter egg pastel she thought was feminine enough for me. Even if I had worn the more traditional pinstripes, it would have been hard to mistake me for a boy. I was the one with the giant bow in my hear. Thank you, Molly Ringwald, for all those coming of age movies you made with those big bows in your hair.
I wasn't allowed to go to movies, but I remember reading all about them in the teen magazines I saved my money to buy. The Brat Pack had to be the coolest of all the cool movie stars. I listened to the theme songs on the radio and guessed the plots. You know your were a part of the eighties when you still believe, in 2008, that music was the best. Seriously, whatever happened to songs like "Separate Lives" and "Time After Time"? I still miss the edgy music of "Miami Vice," but it is the love ballads like "Ain't Missing You at All" and "You're the Inspiration" that makes me want to grab my husband and dance today.
George Strait, Reba McIntire and Alabama were topping the charts in country music. I had an eclectic ear, even then. Depending on my mood, you could hear Huey Lewis and the News or Ronnie Milsap from my boom box. I didn't carry it around with me, but it wasn't too far away.
"Do you remember who shot J.R.?" I asked my friend. She had to think about it for a minute before she got the answer right.
I knew that one without even thinking about it. It was Kristen, Sue Ellen's sister. She had an affair, just like half of Texas, with J.R. My friend had forgotten that she was also the mother of Christopher, the baby Bobby and Pam adopted. J.R. wasn't the father and poor little Christopher was born in prison when his mother was sent to prison for trying to kill J.R. I remember all of that. I even bought a t-shirt that read, "I didn't shoot J.R., but I wanted to."
"Dallas" competed with "Dynasty" in the ratings. I doubt I will never forget the cat fights between Crystal and Alexis. I remember gasping as they fought in the swimming pool. I was alarmed at the fight, just that they both ruined those expensive clothes they always wore. I never dreamed I could ever wear clothes that expensive.
I did copy the style, not the price tags. Shoulder pads and the wide belts. All of the bold colors and geometrical shapes. My closet was full of those clothes. I also had the torn jeans and layers of tank tops. My leg warmers were carefully folded in a dresser drawer. What was I thinking - leg warmers? As much as I loved the clothes of the eighties and hope many of the styles eventually come back, I won't be wearing leg warmers.
The eighties were a great decade to be a teenager. I look back at those years and I am thankful I was becoming an adult then. The sixties and seventies were too turbulent for me and the nineties were far too dangerous for teens finding there own way. It was a much simpler time, compared to now. I am still hoping the clothes will come back in style. Maybe in time for my daughter to enjoy them during her teen years. If she wants to wear leg warmers, I will probably let her. When I see her with them on, I know exactly what I will say - "Gag me with a spoon."