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Pa Called Ma Crazy and Ma Called Pa Evil.

I don't find anything wrong with a parent confiding to a child. In fact, it is prudent to do so, leading to the child's upbringing. Growing up, all my mother use to do was say such poor things about my hard working father and his side of the family. I didn't understand half, if not all the statements but, I knew they weren't of his shinning moments. I also, never witnessed anything to be true about the comments directed towards him. The lack of her conviction, lead to help me question people's intention and gave me a sense of judgment of character early in life. Often, her insults of the man, contradicted his hard work ethic and love for us. This pattern continued till, she became very ill due to diabetes. Growing older, I saw her mind was slipping. Before her death, she became very violent, and her statements were very askew from reality. This was the person who raised me, mostly while my father was away working hard.

Since her death, I was able to talk and communicate to my father, all the hardships my sisters and I received growing up. He was so shocked to hear all the negative things reported about him to us. Alot, of conflict could of been avoided if he shared his thoughts of her mindset with us. In exchange, he also revealed how she equally told lies about us to him. When I asked my father why he never came to us about the situation, he said it wasn't his place to go around the mother. Wishing he did, would have resulted in less physical abuse, and sexual abuse force to my sisters and I.

If I can make one statement, there is nothing wrong with communication, at times it's the most important action. There isn't anything wrong with being bias as long as two sides can confront each other and the person they are impressing upon. When this happens a person is able to change their views. Another area of importance is truth. Even if each parent feels the other is wrong, the child should know the real direction the family is heading in. It's up to the child to make his or her own decisions. Holding feelings and information back from the child is the wrong way of going about things.

In conclusion, the child has a right to know what is happening in the family. Second, it teaches the child to have an opinion, in regards to events around him. Third, hurtful events could be avoided, when a parent discusses how they feel about the other parent, and vice versa. Last piece of thought, it is never good to express your opinion in the shadows. Don't look to infulence the child behind the scenes, but open and don't deny your feeling to the child and love interest.

Learn more about this author, Mr.Dayfield Lewis.
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