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Words and phrases have amused me for many years, especially when you take the time to listen, and think about what folks are saying.

I think it began, in the late 60's, with the show "Bewitched" and the character Uncle Arthur, played by Paul Lynn. He used words and phrases to emphasize something silly.

One of his play on words was, "My feet are killing me", and there on his feet were little guns, shooting at him. It was always funny, but it caused me to think about what other silly words and phrases we use on a daily basis.

Now when I hear folks say, "My feet are killing me", I ask what are they using knives or guns? People who don't realize how their words sound, look at me, like a calf at a new gate. Nearly everyone will look at their feet as if guns or knives have suddenly appeared, and now their lives are in danger.

How about the phrase, "I'm trying to catch a cold", and I say, "What are you using to catch that cold, a baseball mitt"? Sometimes my imagination gets the better of me and I see people jumping up and down trying to catch colds. Then when they are sick in bed, they complain they don't understand how they "caught that cold". Well you talked yourself into being sick, by repeating what you hear others say.

I like the words and phrases we use as parents, such as, "You're driving me crazy"! Wow can I watch I've never seen anyone actually go crazy, can I ride along and watch? Here's another great one, "If you don't shut up I'm gonna slap your face off"! Sounds like a Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny cartoon, where Daffy does get his face knocked off and even backwards.

Here's a fun thing to say, "I'm freezing to death." Please hold that thought let me grab a snack and a comfy chair, I gotta see this. I guess one of my favorite sayings is, "I am starving to death", and you know without a doubt they had breakfast a few hours ago.

Have you ever been "tickled to death", or thought you were so hot you were "burning up"? I've been tickled to the point I thought, I would "die laughing", and the only smoke I've seen coming from anyone, was that nasty little habit called a cigarette.

One other saying I have a difficult time with is, "I just love them to death". How can you love someone to death, is that really love or a secret desire to get rid of that annoying in-law?

There are many words and phrases floating around, some of them will, "tickle you pink" and some may cause to, "blow off some steam." However you take funny words and phrases, just remember it's probably, "just another Monday".

Learn more about this author, K L Humphreys.
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