How many times will life allow you to re-invent yourself? What are your options at 50-plus after a rewarding career in the sweet spot of the telecommunications boom of the late 1990's? What choices are left after you gambled in the California real estate boom of 2000 to 2005 and came out far enough ahead to keep your seat at the table but not to retire?
It's true what your guidance counselors in high school and employment counselors later on tell you. Find a passion and pursue it. Look deeply into your soul and know what motivates you to achieve. Use that, and only that, as your guide when you look for meaning in your professional and personal lives. If you have only money as your guide, you'll get distracted from the things that matter. If you come to understand who you are and selflessly offer the best of it to others, the money will come. As trite a all of this sounds, it's true.
I tried it the other way for 20 years and I found myself on a plateau from which I only recently escaped. It wasn't a bad place to be, but I was truly stuck in a rut. I had to move up to the next level and it was not about the money.
For about a year longer than I should have, I lived like the high times would never end. I accomplished some good things and acted on a few middle-aged fantasies. I indulged an un-lived dream and learned how to handle a 40 ft. sailboat. I bought a retirement home in Mexico, half of which I eventually had to sell so I could keep it. I raised a son to adulthood and another to early adolescence.
I had some cash left from all of this, but the interest it accrued wouldn't even pay for the gas and insurance on the 5 series BMW I acquired 3 years ago as a sop to my middle-aged ego. The thrill of driving a nice car wears off after the first month anyway. I came to the conclusion, finally, that money and material pursuits are an illusion. The more we grasp at them, the more the happiness they're supposed to bring to us, eludes us.
But we still have to live a decent life, pay the bills and raise the kids. I found myself in need of income and after 7 years of self-employment, I was facing un-employment without any of the benefits that may have come if I worked for someone else. I broke down and realized that I had to get a job.
But what's available for someone pushing 53? This is the age when most people are counting the years until their corporate pension kicks in and the health care benefits become permanent. I started to move my resume in the telecommunications business to see if I could re-establish myself there. There were plenty of jobs available for the 50-plus crowd on a number of websites. But they were all entry level retail jobs at mobile phone service outlets that had a strong component of the "meeting and greeting" function. Try to picture yourself in a blue smock, hailing everyone who enters the store with lines like "welcome to everyday low prices". I thought I had much more to contribute.
I became bitter after the third or fourth interview when the 20 or 30-something on the other side of the table insinuated that I was over the hill, in the guise of praising my many years of experience. "You do have a great deal of experience, Sir, certainly more than anyone else in this organization."
The other innuendo I heard had something to do with keeping up with the new fast-paced high-tech environment that had taken hold since the color television had been invented. "You know sometimes we put in up to 80 hour work weeks around here" said a young marketing director, as he fiddled with his Blackberry (My god, was he holding a little television in his hand? How did they fit all those vacuum tubes in that tiny thing?) He looked like he bought his first razor the previous week and was still learning how to use it. I could only conclude to myself that this venture-funded group of ldealistic Youths didn't know how to work very efficiently if they had to put in those kinds of hours, but I decided to keep that observation to myself.
Leaving the bitterness behind, it was time to take inventory of what I had to offer and who might want it. I studied languages in college, I had lived in Europe and Asia as a telecommunications executive, and I knew something about learning languages and adapting to new cultures. I also had over 25 years of solid, hard-won experience in evaluating technology companies, getting myself hired into them and getting promoted.
I had risen in the corporate world to well above the middle level, just shy of a vice president's position. Not high enough to become a CEO of even a small company and now, too old for anything lower. Companies will look at a 50-something if is he is indeed, CEO material with recent experience. Beneath this, there are younger and supposedly more energetic candidates who will work longer hours for less money. Or so the thinking goes in our youth-oriented culture.
I had to look at the pieces that had made up the mosaic of my life, take them apart and reassemble them in into a new creation that would sell in the current market place. I also decided for the first time in my professional life not to chase the money, but look for something that truly stirred my passions.
My first love in college was foreign languages. I had grown up in a household in New Jersey where the second and sometimes the only language spoken was Italian. I had an affinity for languages from birth and I pursued them throughout my academic career. I went on to get a graduate business degree, but only for the sake of practicality. All of this training helped me throughout my career. Although there were not many jobs that required my particular combination of skills, there were even fewer candidates who had them.
But now at my age, how could I reconfigure these skill sets and market them? I know that many people frequently opt to teach, since this is one area where age is not a show-stopper. Of course I studied a program of language teaching, specifically teaching English to speakers of other languages, or TESOL as it's know in the industry.
There's lots of competition in this field too, so I had to look at some way to stand out from the crowd. After becoming certified as a TESOL instructor at the local university, I found part time work at a private language school that caters to young Europeans, Asians and Latin Americans. The business English classes in many of these schools are frequently under served and plagued by the conundrum of having many experienced teachers, but none with direct business experience. The flip side is the fact that most business people, at least those still employable in their chosen field, will not go into teaching because of the pay level.
I had identified a niche, and worked it for all it was worth. I was able to fashion lesson plans that functioned on a number of levels. I used current events and my own experiences to develop original materials. This worked well in the classroom since my lessons had the ring of truth and I knew how to make them come alive. The language teaching methods I had learned tapped into knowledge I had possessed deep inside since I was a young boy. I was getting exceptional evaluations from my students and the academic director asked me to come on full time.
But I had to politely decline, since the job hardly paid enough to cover the cost of commuting to the school, only about 18 miles from my home. The money issue was still a problem. It was impossible for me to earn enough to pay my bills living in southern California. I could do either one of two things; 1. Leave California, or 2. Find a better paying job.
I looked back into my past experience, and having lived in Asia, I spoke to many people who were starting language schools there where the demand was skyrocketing. I didn't have the resources to start my own school, but I did look into the possibility of getting a job in a market where the demand far outstripped the supply and the pay levels were higher as a result.
Through research and contacts, I've landed a position at a private institution in Hanoi teaching business administration, English as a second language, and business communications. Yes that's Hanoi as in Vietnam. This is the place that conjures up images of war, POWs and celebrities caught on film shilling for the local government.
I've traveled many times there since 1993 for business and for vacations. I know it as a place that is vibrant and growing. Most of the population, over 65%, were born after the war, and are not interested in reliving the past. Everyone one else just wants to move on. The cost of living is far less than southern California. I'm being paid at a level that's seems meager by our standards, but will allow me to live comfortably over there.
I will arrive on June 19th, get settled into a home, and start work on July 7th when the summer term begins. I'll need to learn to speak Vietnamese, even though the curriculum is taught entirely in English. I'll meet challenges that I never thought I'd have to meet at my age. This is really the last chance I'll have to re-invent myself so I'll have to do the best with it.
Although I face this change with a few concerns, I feel good about it and it feels like the best use of what I have to offer. If I can give any advice at all it's to echo some of my opening thoughts. Look at what you have that no one else has, and offer it up to the universe. The world is ultimately fair and we all get from life exactly what we put into it, the good, the bad and the indifferent.
We all have something unique. We can rework our experiences, add to them, and market them in a way that no else can. We can be productive, useful human beings until we're no longer physically capable.
I'll be following up this article with more once I've started my new life. I'll let you know how it all turns out.
One Month in Hanoi - Whaddaya Ya Got to Offer?
"What've you got to offer?" I've been asking myself this question a great deal lately. For far too long, the first question that came to mind was "What's in it for me?" This was backwards. To get anything at all in this life, we need to give something first. I came to this conclusion late in life. I'm not atoning for past sins, although I committed plenty of those. But I realized that we can only be successful in our lives to the extent we help others be successful in theirs. This was an epiphany that struck me at a time when it was almost too late to do anything about it.
I moved here to Vietnam a month ago, consciously putting myself in a situation here in Hanoi where the things I have to offer are valuable to many. I'm fortunate to have the chance to help others get the things they want and need. On a very basic level, an English language education is seen as essential for any advancement above an average standard of living here.
This is a country where the market economy has only been open up in the last 15 years. People here believe they need, and they certainly want, all of the material things that we've taken for granted so long.
Look at it from the local perspective when in comes to transportation. We've all had cars all our lives, and in southern California, one's ride is as much a fashion statement as a mode of transport. In Vietnam, there is no car culture here the way there is in the USA. And even though it's changing for us quite rapidly with the increasing price of fuel, the Vietnamese still want to own cars. But most people can't afford the cost of a new or even a used car. There's a 150% import duty on all cars, making most of them prohibitively expensive.
The Toyota Camry that you bought for $25,000 in the US costs about $67,000 here. This is totally out of the question for most Vietnamese. The Honda sedan that's made in the new factory about 60 miles from Hanoi, goes for around $15,000 and most of these end up as taxis. At least 80% of the vehicles on the streets of Hanoi have only two wheels.
So what do I tell people in my business classes about their nascent need to consume? Our desire for material goods and the need for immediate gratification has backfired on us in America and we're now in the midst of a painful correction that will affect many of us for years to come. How do you tell people who've never had it as good as you, that the need for more and better becomes empty once you've attained it?
I do see some cultural counterbalances here that might slow down the march to mindless consumption just a bit. I polled students in my cross cultural communications class about what they look for in a mate and the money issue was expressed, but it was far down on the list and well in perspective. Almost all of the women answered that they just wanted enough money to raise their children in relative comfort, and that the man's family, education and upbringing were far more important. The young men said much the same about their choices.
I don't expect young people to forego most of the little luxuries that we've enjoyed in the USA for so long, but to look at my students you would never know that most of them come from affluent families. It costs $10,000 to $15,000 a year for these young people to attend the private college where I teach. This is an unheard of sum for all but the most well off of Vietnamese families.
But they all seem to dress about the same, they all ride 120 CC Honda or Yamaha motorbikes, and although a bit immature, they all seem to have their values in order.
So it brings me back to my original question. What've you got to offer? This is what we all need to ask ourselves before we try anything. Like applying for a job, looking for a lifetime partner, and making business decisions. Teaching English and business to young people who are just starting out in life in a place that is waking up from a long social and economic slumber gave me the chance to share a bit of what I've learned and give something back.